You're right. One day you won't be here, neither will I, or anybody else. And you can't control most things in life. You can't control the weather, the traffic, how people will respond to you. There are too many variables and unknowns. Unfortunately you seem to be letting that dominate your life. I've always felt like I'll live every day like it could well be my last (cause guess what...it could) and enjoy everything I can. I act like a goof most of the time because I no longer let others perception of me influence my behavior. I simply don't care. I'll soon be planning my half-century party (turning 50 in 2 years). I'm psyched about it and hope I'm still around for it. Your life is what you make it. You get a clean slate every day. Spending your time worrying about this may not be the best way to occupy your day. Get to that point where you simply don't care and you'll be able to enjoy each and every moment. I know we all come from different situations, but we all wind up in the same place in the end. So don't worry about what you can't control. I wish you the best. Best of luck to all of us.