[waves]

these are beautiful dishes Mari!

Originally Posted by Mari

I especially like the second one... both in edibility and in esthetics!

~ waves ~

[Mari]

Hi,


I do not understand why we ascribe morality to food or to our behavior. We are not better people because we ate this or did not eat that. I am not racking up points toward an "A" by doing certain things correctly.
Food is not bad. Food is not good either. We can free ourselves from moral judgements here.

Sunshine is good except when it is not. If we get too much sunshine and get a sunburn do we say that we were bad? No. We had more than was appropriate.
We make choices based on what other things are going on.
Our food can be part of a plan that we have that fits in with our other plans.

More importantly, HELLO, most of us are 1) bipolar and 2) on meds for bipolar. We do not normally say that our drugs are bad or how we take them is good or bad.
We are doing what we can.

Sometimes, due to the bipolar and the meds, we cannot make choices. During those times we do what the meds and bipolar tell us to do. We can cut ourselves a lot of slack.

M

[ginnie]

I agree, food is nourishment for the body. I for one am glad for taste buds. Loved seeing all the beautiful plates of yummy delights. Food isn't good or bad, we all just need to be sensible really and know what the requirements are for our bodies. Calories in....energy out... The less active I am, the less I eat, More active, can have that cookie. Love all the different foods we present to each other hear. I have learned so many new recipes, and new ways of presenting meals. Great site to do this. thanks all. ginnie

[Mari]

Ginnie,

You make perfect sense.

M

[waves]

Dear Mari

I take the general point of your post... and perhaps it is that way for some folks. I just want to offer another "interpretion" to what can be meant when we use the words "good" and "bad" in the context of food.

Originally Posted by Mari

I do not understand why we ascribe morality to food or to our behavior.

Do we really do that, though? The words good and bad sure do pack a punch. They can easily sound like moral judgements but it is not always the case.

We are not better people because we ate this or did not eat that. I am not racking up points toward an "A" by doing certain things correctly.Food is not bad. Food is not good either. We can free ourselves from moral judgements here.

Well, a Hindu who eats beef might call that "bad" behavior in a moral (religious) sense, because cows are considered sacred. By contrast, if I on the other hand eat a Twinkie, I might say I might say I was bad, and I might call the Twinkie bad (even if it was "goooood"). Here, I am only asserting that I feel I would have been better off had I not eaten it. I am expressing a judgement as to how unhealthy I consider that food to be, and by extension, that eating such a food is unhealthy behavior, by my personal nutritional standards. It is not a moral judgement. It does not imply that I consider Twinkies or their eaters immoral.

I had a colleague who got migraine headaches from monosodium glutamate. We had a running joke because, at a restaurant we frequented regularly, he would always ask them not to add any MSG to his dish and they would say, "OK, NOOO MSG....... (pause)... jus' a li'l bit." Just a little bit was enough to put him KO for the day! He considered any food with MSG bad. It caused him harm. He did not mean it was immoral.

One more thing. Suppose I go on a diet to achieve some personal goal - e.g. lose weight. I choose and commit to a precise diet plan which includes certain foods, and excludes others. The excluded foods are not limited to what we typically consider junk foods - they include some wholesome foods too. Now, when I eat one of the excluded foods, I might say I ate a "bad" food. By that I don't mean the food is evil incarnate, I am just referring to the fact that it was not on my plan. I might very well say I have been bad, and I might even feel guilty (typical with immoral acts!), disappointed etc. However the assertion of being "bad" in effect refers to the fact that I broke my commitment to myself - I didn't live up to a behavioral standard I set for myself. Even if it were an unreasonable standard, when one breaks a commitment, feeling "bad" is natural. It does not imply that one feels immoral, although it may be so in some cases here. There is certainly a feeling of having let oneself down, of being disappointed in one's ability to stick to something. Even when I hear someone say, "I am a bad person" in these contexts, while I would object to such phrasing, I would interpret it to mean they feel disappointed in their ability to stick to their plan AND may well have extended the disappointment to the idea that they are incapable of sticking to anything. One would then have to question the person to understand if they have extended the self-judgement to a moral level. Some do. Some don't.

I'll just add that the latter thought process is one reason I dislike rigorous diets - because it is pretty darn easy to lapse from meeting the standard every now and then and, especially if now and then happens a few times over, the feelings can be terribly destructive and i believe these diets can do psychological harm, besides being ineffective if a person rebounds from them. But that is again my own judgement (and not a moral one ).

~ waves ~

[Mari]

Dear Waves,

These are good points.
I could have thought through that post a little bit more before hitting send. Here is another attempt.
I guess what I was trying to says is that we can help each other on our roads we are traveling and celebrate our successes while being free of judgement.

We can be kinder to ourselves.


M

[waves]

Originally Posted by Mari

I guess what I was trying to says is that we can help each other on our roads we are traveling and celebrate our successes while being free of judgement.

I like that way of putting it.

And we do all need to be kinder to ourselves.

Several of us are rather good at beating ourselves up when we take an unexpected detour... or simply flop down and can't seem to get up again... (who, me?)

~ waves ~

[bizi]

well I am going to go to the gym wednesday night....must get back into some sort of routine....miss it. now that jeff is out of school we will spend more time together and I won't feel guilty about not walking in the evenings together.
so I can go to the gym. and then shower after working out. I have been so missing my routine and regular showering after sweating working out. But I stopped going because I was having severe fatigue in the evening having to take a nap, but that hasn't happened in a while so I think that it is time to restart going to the gym....I have regained all of the weight that i lost so this is upsetting to me.
wish me luck
bizi

[Mari]

Dear Bizi,

I send you lots of luck. It will be nice to have a routine.

M

[Dmom3005]

Sending thought of luck,


Not sure how else to do it.


I am looking into another gym. I believe its time.

I really don't have the money for it on top of my massages.

But I need to water.

So I have to do something.

Donna