thanks David... missed this earlier.
i will listen tomorrow. i took extra meds and am going to sleep now.

(((hugs)))

waves

I experience that empty feeling also at times. It's like living a life in broken pieces,and there's no reason for this to be happening.

Hang in there. I hope that you feel better when you wake up.

I saw this program called,"Angels among us". This program made me feel much better. BF:hug::hug::hug:

Waves,
I hope Friday is better.
Soon you can get out of the bleakness.

Then you can go back to your existential questions about where you are in the world without letting the questions or answers bring you down.

M

thanks Steve and Mari.

last night i had a freak out. actually it is still going. one of my teeth broke. this is really traumatic for me. i can't explain... too long.

i am too tired to take lorazepam, too agitated to take coffee, and too tired and too agitated to go to the hygenist appt i got this afternoon. but it's the first step in getting the thing taken care of - if i leave the dentine eexposed things can degenerate fast i think.

this is all i need. it means having to leave the apartment a lot to chase down tooth repair. that is, provided the tooth is not already beyond recovery.

:Sob::crazy:

:Bow: to the inventor of lorazepam which, however, i am too sleep-deprived to take today :( maybe i will do a coffee-lorazepam combo. :rolleyes:

:Sigh:

other than that. still the same.

waves

Oh, Waves, :heartthrob: :heartthrob: :heartthrob:

'Sorry you are still the same.

You are doing great chasing down teeth concerns while in the middle of a dark mood.

Lots of hugs :hug: :hug: :hug:


M

{{{{{{waves}}}}} :hug: I was so surprised to sign on here this morning and find this thread! Your posts have always been so thoughtful and helpful to me, and I hope at least some of us can make you feel a bit better about things :hug:.

I'm not bipolar, but have just run-of-the-mill depression in addition to my adult ADHD, chronic pain, fibro, etc., but I know how it feels to see your world come crashing down, and be able to live through it and come out the other side. You, perhaps more than anyone, have given me some very concrete advice, 'theories', and tons of support, and I hope that we are able to give you at least some comfort, a smile, and the support that helps you see what a valuable person you are!

Do you find any comfort in your music? I envy anyone who can sing AND accompany themselves! I've never mentioned this, but I have a strange neurological problem with my hands; a doctor said it was called synkinesia, and what it means is that my hands mirror each other when moving my fingers. I will wiggle fingers on one hand, and the fingers on the other hand do the same thing ~~ seems and looks weird, but makes it nearly impossible to play piano, or any other instrument. As with many other 'quirks', I've learned to adapt, but it remains a frustrating deterrent to doing certain fine motor activities... YOU, on the other hand (no pun intended!) can sing AND play guitar, andI bet you are really good! Do you write songs? Some folks can express what they are feeling through their music, are you in that talented group of musicians? I just sang, took piano for the first time in college :rolleyes:, but was given a modified piano proficiency exam due to my weird hands. ~~~ One piano prof at IU said he would love to do a case study on my hands, he found them so 'unusual' :o ~~

Anyway, all I'm trying to say is that you are doing the right thing to discuss it here amongst people who know, love and understand you :grouphug:. I hope you will get some sleep and awaken with a more optimistic outlook. Please keep posting; this place wouldn't be the same without you!! KEEP ON KEEPIN' ON !!

PS...I saw your "see no evil..." icon in your signature, a was a bit taken aback -- I guess that is reflecting your current mood ;) ?

dear waves
i hope they can save the tooth and i am amazed you have the motivation to go out now and try to save it.
i was freaking out when i added that part about your parents but i know what a disappointment they are to you. i don't know how to get rid of expectations that bring us down so painfully. I just asked a friend if he ever suffers fears and he says no because he keeps himself so busy he doesn't have time. I put in about growth but i don't know if that is true. I now basically think it is living through the episode. Practically all the time I turn towards God. that is the only thing that makes sense and the only thing i can cling to. I remind myself that sometimes i think bipolar is a gift to draw one closer to God otherwise one wouldn't have the motivation.
love
bobby

That's so true Bobby. Faith came up like a flower in the desert when I felt the need to open the Bible in my nightmare,and I was comforted. BF:hug::hug::hug:

hey wondered how your day is going?

what is the verdict of the tooth?
bizi

Donna

Someone who cares, but isn't sure what to say.

Donna:grouphug: