NeuroTalk Support Groups - I don't know how to do life

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- - I don't know how to do life (https://www.neurotalk.org/bipolar-disorder/205366-dont-life.html)

hand is a little better than it was earlier but I have to take it easy

Waves,

People do not want to accept that nothing can be done and that the universe is is not good or bad. It is just is. http://www.freesmileys.org/emoticons...object-017.gif

Actually, sick people make them uncomfortable (and make them fearful about their own possible conditions.
They think that if people tried a little bit more that they would be o.k. --
Here they sometimes make it into a religions thing: "Jesus wants you to be happy."
There is a mix of Calvinism in there too but I have to think through that more.

---
So the people who are sick are punished.
But we cannot punish the sick.
Therefore, we make everyone become not sick.
---

My mother always made light of my issues -- mostly because she was not going to deal with them.
I hate her for that.

---

I apologize for not communicating clearly.

Quote:

Actually. I did that beccause I didn't want to upset you with technicalities? Maybe it was silly of me.

Actually, I did use the word "vocabulary" in a early post and it was only until I was writing the post Friday morn that I became aware that it is during the description of "steps" that i am more likely to get hung up. This happens off line as well.

Quote:

he biggest achievement here is having crossed that thick, suffocating field of emotional overgrowth I had to cross to lay a hand on that drive.

Feeling somewhat satisfied is good. You do not have be jubilant / joyous . You accomplished something vital and of big consequence and you feel satisfied.
Maybe you will feel joy on another day about something else.

Quote:

But mainly, I want to teach myself to get through these things and I think the only way is literally to go through and experience, not to dull the experience. I think I have to keep trying, keep whacking at them overgrown fields whenever possible.

Yeah, I cannot be good at meditation. (maybe need a teacher? ). I do the basic breathing stuff.

Quote:

And I just figure that anyone with a great, sunny side up, glass half full attitude might find my sullenness ... well

I do practice this kind of stuff that Louise Hay does/
http://indulgy.com/post/1rJRcuDfO1/louise-l-hay-quotes

I even do so to the point of asking hubby to rephrase a sentence:
Instead of
>I do not understand what is wrong with him.
we have
>I want to understand . . .

Not good examples but you see perhaps.

In my prof, we are are taught if you tell someone NOT to do something, the brain does not hear the NOT and only hears the other words.
When you say
>>Do not be late ----- the person's brain hears Be late.

>>So instead we say be on time.

Sometimes, that is what you are seeing in my posts. It is a "practice" of mine. . . . maybe not a useful one. . . .

Quote:

I think I have to keep trying, keep whacking at them overgrown fields whenever possible.

Yes. That is what we all do. I like the way you put it.
http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-whacky111.gifTake care.

M

i hope your hand feels better
bobby

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mari (Post 1079955)

Actually, sick people make them uncomfortable (and
.
---
So the people who are sick are punished.
But we cannot punish the sick.
Therefore, we make everyone become not sick.
---

I thought this was hilarious! :D (I had to look up Calivinism. Wow... those guys believe some strange things but can't really discuss here I guess.)

Quote:

My mother always made light of my issues -- mostly because she was not going to deal with them.
I hate her for that.

:( I am sorry. It isn't usual with my parents, but I have had it happen with both of them when I was in bad way... I know it hurts. :(

Quote:

Maybe you will feel joy on another day about something else.

I do feel joy about some things. Often things that aren't directly to do with me, but that's ok. I do have some joy in my life. Also, satisfaction is... well, satisfactory. :D Occasionally I feel very satisfied with myself. Usually it has to do with something I cooked. :cool:

waves who has been relieved of cooking duties for today, but that's ok because I have other things to do. (And for a change I have been doing them!)

Quote:

I get the trying to rephrase in a positive/proactive way.

Just FYA.... indeed possibly not a good example. ;) If I were your husband complaining about someone, my rebuttal to you (being the veteran complainer that I am!) would be:

--- "I neither understand, nor much less want to!" :D
OR
--- *heavy sarcasm*... "I want to know what is right with him" http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/s...aughing013.gif

Quote:

In my prof, we are are taught if you tell someone NOT to do something, the brain does not hear the NOT and only hears the other words.
When you say
>>Do not be late ----- the person's brain hears Be late.

>>So instead we say be on time.

I am familiar with a version of this. While I see the usefulness in "affirmative" communication, I feel it can be taken overboard. Not saying you do this. The take-home lesson to me is: "Not" has its place, but we can afford to use it more sparingly.

I've been explicitly taught to avoid negatives like the plague in persuasive writing, because they are perceived, and can condtion audience response in a harmful way. They can undercut positive values being conveyed or even inimicate the audience.

In most professions where effective communication is required, it is beneficial to employ these techniques. I believe it is a also a good cognitive technique that can work on oneself... to improve attitude, perspective, etc.

waves

just wanted to offer hugs and support today. glad that you got some things done waves.
bizi:hug:

Hi, Bizi. Thank you.:):hug: