Bobby,
Holidays can bring up unsettling memories.
It's good to hear that you found benefit from reading Julia Quinn.



M

I don't remember if I ever mentioned it after all these years but I am paranoid. I have been that way since I have been little and it also has interfered with my life. I think part of it was growing up with my father's rage and drinking, the enemy within and projecting the fears without. When I was young my neighbor who was a few years older than I was tried to strangle me twice and all my mother said was don't play with harvey. I don't even think she told his mother. II had some other scary experiences but not as scary. when I got my dogs I got a bit better and wasn't as afraid of walking down side streets. yesterday the friendly visitor came with goodies and a turkey dinner. I could never have done that volunteer work because I would be too paranoid. also I turned down a guy for a date and he threatened to kill me. I believed him.
last night I crashed again. so many painful memories-I really enjoyed reading and tennis and later squash and paddleball

I am sorry about your fears., and that those things happened to you.


Wasn't that wonderful that she bought you a meal.
Really pleased that you are reading again.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi:hug:

the friendly visitor was a man of 84 who does a lot of volunteer work. I almost just applied to adopt another abyssian but stopped myself.

I am glad that you stopped. The 2 cats that you have is already enough work/expense to care for and they may not like another cat coming into the picture.
bizi

I forgot it was very scary having to be in the car when my father was drunk driving. as I mentioned before my parents were very critical. my father was very self critical and my mother wasn't. as I mentioned my father went to harvard law school and he thought his classmates were all idiots. only his professors were bright. I received constant criticism.
the cat had behavior problems and would pee occasionally outside the box. poor kitty cat. no wonder plus the bipolar i am so f@#ked up and never married

I am glad that you have your kitties to love and care for.
You have been thru so much and are worthy of love.
bizi

Sending hugs and good thoughts.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

the new rabbi came over today and it was wonderful. I had an upsetting time with Marci yesterday. she showed no compassion over my explosion and burns and we almost got into a fight. she mentioned how much it hurt when she was burnt a little and I told her I was burnt almost 20 percent of my body in an explosion and suffered post traumatic stress which hasn't left me and made my bipolar anxiety worse. I don;t know what is going to happen. the rabbi is coming over again in a couple of weeks

Bobby

Kind of sounds like you need a break from Marci. Or someone
new for now.

She needs to remember who the person is that employees her
or her boss is.

Not just her friend.

Donna :hug::grouphug: