thanks so much. I remembered that everything works out for the best.
bobby

I go to the cardiologist this morning and am scared. He will see the weight gain. It is just for a check up. I feel like such a mess. I have been so unhappy.
My stomach is slightly upset

Good luck at the cardiologist today. maybe when your new kitten come you will find great joy in her.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

I am depressed and am afraid that only temporarily do I get out of it. I just bought a cat tower for abby which is taller than the ones I have.if i get the other kitty that will be neat but if I don't hopefully abby will like the new toy. she has shown no interest in the cat bed I bought her.
I have a new g.p.The cardiologist recommended him. I told him I wanted somebody nice and gentle.My blood pressure was good. My cardiologist said to eat sushi and no chocolate or chinese food. I like him a lot and his assistant. I flirt with them.I told him I wanted a new g.p. He also recommended a doctor for my cholesterol which would entail a shot a month since I can't take statins. He doesn't know if medicare would pay for it and I told him I didn't have money. I swore a couple of times and I think he liked to see an old lady swear. I am pretty for my age even if I am fat. I wish I could stop spending money. My oldest nephew sent me something cute for the holidays and I just replied cute.
still haven;t heard from courtney.

Maybe put a towel in the cat bed, our cats like to sleep on towels.
bizi

I will try it. I just wrote to courtney about Pika to see if I was still adopting her. I told him I knew what it was like having to study so much and how I hurt a dear aunt's feelings when she visited new york and I couldn't see her because of my studying. I spend so much time looking for the mail. I keep on telling myself that things always work out for the best

I heard from him. I have to set a time with cecilia on the next weekend or saturday. she probably went to new jersey today for agility for her doggies.
she drives two hours there and two hours back and spends two hours there with the doggies training. she takes her dogs out about four times a day. she had cancer and now with her rough schedule she gets tired and then worries if the cancer is coming back. I have to remind her of her grueling schedule and how a 30 year old would be exhausted let alone a 75 year old.
I am so excited!

Glad to hear that you are excited!!!!
have a great day. 75 is still young in my eyes.
bizi

trouble. first i found out that my f#$king doctor didn't review my blood test from two months ago with my high cholesterol and diabetes. I am so glad I am getting rid of her. I think that is malpractice.
next is cecilia. she won't answer the phone. she thinks Pika is a scam because she is so beautiful and it is only thirty dollars. she is strange but she comes from a terrible background.
I just wrote courtney and asked if he has a friend in need who could use 200 dollars to bring her to me. I can't believe this. what will this do to my "friendship" with cecilia

Bobby
Do not give the $200.00 till the kitty is there. Please.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

I wouldn't do that. I think courtney might get fed up. I am so upset with cecilia. I think this ends our friendship. she is too sick to be friends.

I just wrote cecilia again and said I can't be angry at her because she came from such a hellish life and can't trust and it was from adopt a pet and I wouldn't trust craig's list and signed it love bobby.
as I mentioned she and her twin sister were premature and her mother told the hospital to kill them and they didn't speak swedish til five. her father and mother didn't like kids and they had five in six years

i sent this to cecilia

Relevance
?
Best Answer: Yes, Adoptapet.com is totally real. In fact, it's a certified non-profit organization. I found my two dogs on their site and I love it. I've become a volunteer for them and I try to get all of my local rescue groups to use their service.

You are misunderstanding how these sites work, though. Neither Adoptapet nor Petfinder actually has animals themselves. They're sites where other animal shelters and rescue groups post pets for adoption. When you call or email about a pet, you're not calling Adoptapet, you're calling an animal shelter who uses Adoptapet. So if you're having a problem with one of these groups, you should let adoptapet know so they can check it out.

I am so unbelievably upset. It is like a nightmare. Like a fool I am I just had a cup of coffee. I am so wound up/ boy do I need compassion.

I don't think I will hear from him again. I wonder if cecilia read my emails and how she feels.
It is really painful to grow old without a family who never really cared about you and to be mentally ill on top of it.to be alone sucks. I am feeling sorry for myself

I dropped off the monkey i bought for prince. cecilia didn't answer the door-i feel so empty

You are like family to us bobby.
((((((HUGS))))
love you
bizi
I am sorry you are hurting.

thank you so much bizi. I turn to you. I haven't heard from either of them. My depression is terrible but I know that even if I got Pika it would still rear its ugly head. There is no solution. I just took a nap. The nightmare hasn't gone away. I am afraid to write to courtney again. He must think cecilia and I are nuts and wouldn't want pika to be with me. I just got two more emails from that adoptapet organization and there was no comparison and they didn't even look like abys. It added to the pain

I'm so sorry that the issue with Cecilia and the kitty is making you feel abandoned, and you are remembering how shitty your family treated (and your nephews treat) you :hug::hug::hug:

I wish Cecilia would just come see you, call you, or return one of your emails soon so that you know whether or not she will bring you to get the new kitty once and for all. I hate that she's not doing that :hug::hug::hug:

It would be wonderful if Courtney could find someone to bring the new kitty to you, and for less money. I think if it was a scam, you would have heard back from him sooner after your $200 offer. If he's only charging $30, he may just want to make the sale with as little hassle as possible, or he's looking around for someone willing to do the job. IDK, but just in case he's stringing you along, I would not up your offer.

I got Rocky and Buddy through PetFinder. Rocky cost $250, and I think Buddy was somewhere around $50, maybe less, and he came with all his first shots. They were both positive experiences.

I hope everything works out for you :hug::hug::hug:

I'm glad you got a new PCP

Bobby

Remember this was just yesterday, so you need to wait just a little
longer. Its possible Cortney hasn't even seen them yet.

Give it a little more time.

Donna:grouphug::hug:

I haven't heard from him. I heard from cecilia. she said she couldn't do it this weekend. she said could I make Pika happy. It would be traumatic for her. I said yes because she is coming from a great background . she asked if I asked the board since we are supposedly only are supposed to have two cats and a dog. I said no but after three months it is okay. I don't want to ask them and she is a little kitty. that gets me a little nervous. the worse I think could happen was I would have to find another home for her. they couldn't thrown me out I don't think at my age.
I think she is out of town this weekend so I don't know what to write courtney if he is still interested. I want to write him something. I guess I will say that cecilia is going to agility trials this weekend but next weekend should be find. I pray we are still on. I am so wound up and depressed. I am so stressed. I might try to read. the itches are all back all over the place. I put on calamine lotion and so far it is not working.my whole body is itching and crawling sensation.

I just sent an email to courtney to see if we are still on next weekend. I feel rotten and stressed and whatever

I ams orry about the itch returning.
Are there any new products that you are using soap washing detergent, shampoo?
You sound miserable.
(((((HUGS))))
bizi

nothing new. I wonder if it is stress. I haven't heard from him. I bet he has changed his mind about me. scratch scratch

S- so unhappy to read that you itching is back! :hug::hug::hug:

I'm glad that you finally heard back from Cecilia, but I'm so sorry that you're still in limbo and stressed out :hug::hug::hug:

I hope you hear back from Courtney soon, too :hug:

I think it is over. I haven't heard from him all day. I am beyond upset. I haven't taken any medicine all day for blood pressure or anything. can;t get myself to do it

bobby,
I don't understand your not taking your meds?????
bizi

just couldn't get myself to do it. i am feeling very self destructive. I just feel so awful. I was so looking forward to that kitten. Now I am not looking forward to anything. I can;t feel compassion for myself. I am having a hard time feeling compassion for cecilia. I got into a bit of a disagreement with zeynep.

took my medicine. physically I was really hurting. My back, legs and stomach hurt. My depression is full force. I tried to read but couldn't. this kitten thing was a shock to my system. also this cecilia thing was a shock. she added in her message what was wrong. my voice sounded funny. i wrote and said I was very depressed. I hope she doesn;t call me for a while because I don't know if I will be able to control myself. Abby isn't that affectionate

bobby, maybe the new kitten will be affectionate?
Are you still getting pika?
sorry about your depression being so bad right now.
And for your troubled relationships.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

I haven't heard from him. I think it means he has crossed me off his list. it is a shock to my system and has added to my deep depression

((((HUGS))))
bizi

i just wrote to cecilia and said i am heart broken and said that is it like somebody ripped away her prince from her. I said that i had told him at first she thought it was a scam.

I remember reading back that you said everything happens for a reason... Maybe Pika is not the special kitty out there that is meant for you, but I’m sorry that things haven’t worked out (((HUGS)))

I am so sorry that you are feeling so depressed right now :hug::hug::hug:

It sounds like you are being a bit self-destructive. Please keep taking the meds you need, and try to be mindful in your interactions with your friends that you may be overly sensitive right now (((HUGS)))

I have been unable to read back very far because I was gone so long, but when was the last time you saw your pdoc, and are you back on an antidepressant?

Love & hugs to you

I do believe everything happens for a reason and that is what I have been telling myself now over and over and over and over and am trying not to understand. I just saw my doctor and we decided that no antidepressants seem to be working on me. I told him sometimes I am not depressed and sometimes reading helps. He knows holidays seasons are hard. this afternoon abby has wanted affection. zeynep and i talked for about an hour and I mostly listened. her life is hard. she has difficult adult children and a very difficult old ex husband.
I will make myself take my medicine and try not to be so self destructive. I am in the mood. I have to take care of my cats. I have to keep on telling myself that. I had to lash out at cecilia. I felt better afterwards than bottling it in. How dare she asked why my voice sounded upset on the phone. f^&k her big time.

Sending you some hugs my friend. Remember the thing is that
you still don't honestly know whether Pika would be friendly to
you or not. So maybe you can keep looking and get a kitty for
you.

Donna:hug::grouphug:

I wasn't actively looking. I belong to the list for abyssinians. sending a picture of her to show you how adorable she is. she looks so friend;y besides beautiful. yesterday abby came to me in the bed six times!

That is wonderful Bobby! :)

Cats are fickle. Rocky is really fickle like that, but he usually goes to Corey a lot. Corey gets mad when he is aloof. He hasn't been very interested in me since I came home from the hospital. I think he's still mad at me for leaving :(
At least Buddy and Dottie love me lots :)

probably because you smell different? tomorrow I am having pudge groomed to lion cut. NO SHAMPOO. abby was really hostile when pudge was bathed. when she wasn;t bathed all was okay. yesterday I was very busy with both my kitty cats. It is as if they knew! do you think so? God works in mysterious ways especially with cats>
love
bobby

spent close to an hour on the phone with suri this morning my best friend in israel who has breast cancer and it has probably moved to her lungs. last night she was terrified because she had two very deep coughs and she said she felt unworthy because she was given this awful form of cancer. I told her I spent most of the weekend talking to God because of what happened with the kitty cat issue and that was telling myself that whatever is God's will is good and she shouldn;t fight God's will. We can't second guess God. I wasn;t so blunt. I said that God loves us and we don't have control. She was beating herself up. I said that was the last thing she should do. I forgot to tell her she should spend much of her time looking at God's beauty rather than dwelling on the negative.
I told her I just came from a very bad place and wished I were dead and through talking to God I felt much better. She said we had to talk more.'
still haven't talked to cecilia. don't plan on calling her. don't know what will happen. I need her more than she needs me but still feeling too much pain.
tomorrow that lovely rabbi is coming over again. told him I missed him. will ask him how you can be happy and still feel suffering which is God's gift.
Marci was wonderful this afternoon.