I am sorry you are having agitation and wish corey supported you better.
((((HUGS)))
bizi

I got a call back from my pdoc's office saying that the on-call nurse wanted me to come into the office for an appointment (today). I'll be seeing a psychiatrist I've never seen before. That makes me nervous. Seeing anyone other than my pdoc makes me nervous. He doesn't know my psych or med history, and may not understand that I can't afford the new meds on the market... and I've blown through pretty much everything else.

Anyway, this kinda feels like straight mania right now even though I have high anxiety and a lot of things to worry about, and I think some of the catastrophic thinking I've been having may actually be paranoia. If it is a mixed episode, it is definitely mania-dominant.

My upstairs neighbor, Ellen, 1/2 of the couple we have been having problems with, came down the fire stairs (spiral staircase that is actually pretty cool looking) to talk to me this morning when I was smoking a cigarette, and acted like nothing was wrong. We spoke for about 10-15min, but nothing about our noise complaints. I wonder if Janet ever bothered to call

I've been so busy running around cleaning everything, I've been running myself into the ground, so I'm exhausted and in pain. I smoked pot yesterday afternoon so I could get some much-needed sleep. Corey started in on the 12pk he brought home with him after work right away, so by the time I woke up from my 2 1/2hr nap, he was totally s- faced. Then, I had to drive him to the store to buy more beer. At least he was in a good mood.


I forgot to mention that I did try Stop and Shop's pick-service on Friday. It worked out very well. The young man put everything in the car for me, including 2 cases of water. The only caveats were that they don't sell the ice cream I love, and one of the nectarines I bought was rotten. I plan on using the service again. I didn't have to drag myself through the store or worry about asking anyone for help

I couldn't have walked through the supermarket on Friday anyway. For the first time, I started to have painful spasticity in my left leg in the pool, which prevented me from doing most of my walking exercises. Rare. It was really messed up all day.

when is your appointment? I will be thinking of you.
Am sorry about the spasms in your leg that prevented you from walking.
Not good!
bizi

Kay
I will be thinking of you too. Hope the appointment went or
goes good.

Donna

I'm definitely MANIC.

Oh boy, what a big to-do yesterday's appointment was. I met with a shrink AND an NP I've never seen before for about an HOUR. They pretty much wanted to go over my whole psych and med history, and all my current symptoms. I thought the shrink's eyes were going to pop out of his head when he asked how much Seroquel I was on, and I told him 800mg.

Pretty much all they could do was add something else (hopefully) temporarily to treat this episode. I've been through so many meds that the options were limited. It came down to Rexulti and Ability. I've taken both before without any side effects. But Rexulti is marketed for Bipolar Depression, and I took something marketed for that (Latuda) for a hypo episode, I ended up in the looney bin, so I chose Abilify. 5mg a day for now...
It cost me $128 dollars for 15 pills!!! I looked on GoodRx and I can get a coupon for the pharmacy at the supermarket to for $35, so I will obviously be doing that next time.

They wanted to see me again today, and again early next week. I guess they think I'm that bad off...

I came home really animated (and temporarily really agitated because the script cost so much). I can't remember if Corey has seen me that bad or not, but he looked uncomfortable to say the least. I think it scared him.

I'm having a lot of issues with pain and am exhausted because of all the cleaning I've been doing, but I can't relax or slow down. I ended up smoking MJ, which did slow me down, but I couldn't sleep when I tried to take a nap.

So guess what I did?
Last night I accidentally took my night meds twice again. I guess I took my pills and smoked then went to bed. I couldn't fall asleep right away, and a while later, I wasn't sure I took my pills. So, I looked at my phone to see what day it was, and it said Wednesday, so I got out of bed to check my pill case, and the Wednesday slot was filled, so I took the pills...
I'm a f- idiot. I should have been looking at the Tuesday slot, but it was 1am, so of course my phone said it was Wednesday.
I didn't wake up until 11:30am!!! And after all that sleep, I still felt f- up. So, I checked my pill case, and realized what I did. Obviously I can't drive today, so I called and left a message for the new pdoc.
What a terrible time to make a mistake like that!!!

The new pdoc called to ask how I was. She's an idiot. She couldn't follow how much med I took and kept asking. I was getting very irritated. And she wanted to know how I felt the Abilify was working... how the f- should I know? I took 1400mg of Seroquel last night!!! I told her that I would have a better idea tomorrow. So, I guess I'm supposed to call someone tomorrow to tell them how I'm doing... I will probably be still manic, or at least hypo because this episode is a biggie.

The new pdoc is going to try to get me an appointment with my regular pdoc sooner than the one I have scheduled next month... good luck with that.

I hope the abilify works for you, it was activating for me.
((((HUGS)))))
bizi

Kay

I hope you can figure out some way to get the med problem
figured out. Maybe when you take the meds you can set out
the morning meds. Or are the meds all together in one pill container.

I know my mom did her's all in separate containers. She would put
up the ones she took, and take down the next group.
Usually it worked for her.

I really wish I knew how to help you.

Donna

Because I've made med mistakes in the past, I bought 2 very different colored and shaped pill containers. I keep the small purple day one is in the drawer in the coffee table and the big blue and white night one in a drawer in the bathroom. And I take my pills right BEFORE I smoke MJ and go to bed so I don't forget them... One would think that that would prevent med errors...
I'm going to try putting a bright orange sticker on the correct night dose to take, and will not move it until the next morning. I hope it helps.
Apparently just taking the correct dose of my meds causes enough problems. I don't need to keep poisoning myself

I tried Abilify in the past as a primary mood stabilizer. I went all the way up to the max of 30mg, but it didn't work for me. At the time, there was no generic available, so it cost me over $500/mo, and put me in the Medicare donut hole. Obviously it wasn't worth it.

I hope I have better luck with it as an adjunct med...
In the past, I've had some manic episodes that seem to respond to meds/dosage changes, but then my symptoms come right back- sometimes worse. That's why I like to catch things early. But this came on really fast, so I missed that opportunity.

The effects of the overdose didn't last as long as I expected. By the time Corey came home, I was okay. But later, I felt like I was hypo. I didn't even consider taking a nap, and was still wide awake at 1am.

I only got 4 1/2hrs sleep last night, so I'm tired, but I think I'm probably still manic. I'm still agitated, I'm having a really hard time sitting still, and my thinking is definitely not linear, but I'm in a good mood? I don't think I'm as bad as I was on Tuesday, but IDK. It's early, so it's hard to be sure.
I want to use the Pea Pod pick-up service again on Friday, but I have to put in my order early so I can get the pick up time I want. I'm having a hard time settling down long enough to make up my shopping list tho.

I just took my morning meds a little while ago, including the Abilify, and I feel like I'm going to puke. Anyway, I guess I will see if those symptoms get better, worse, or if there is no change because of the Abilify. So far no change, but I will have to give it more time.

I'm supposed to call the pdoc office and leave a message regarding how I'm feeling today. And they were able to get me an appointment with my regular pdoc early on Monday morning. I hope to be sane, or close to it, by then tho...

So, it's Thursday. My upstairs usually come home between 9-9:30pm s-faced and rowdy... not looking forward to tonight. I still don't know if Janet ever called Ellen about my complaints, or how well they were received, so I don't know what to expect...

Just because someone is manic, it doesn't mean that they are in/stay in a good mood all the time. Ellen and Adam had better keep it down, because they don't want me to go up there to knock on their door the way I am right now.

Could you write down when you took your meds?
Would that help?
((((HUGS))))
bizi

Good luck.

Have a great day.

Donna