I didn't intend to scare you of course.

I only have one coffee (from ground beans) a day and that gets my brain waking up first thing in the morning. If I have coffee later in the day I can't sleep. I'm very sensitive to caffeine.

A lot of my sleep issues are related to overthinking and overwhelm so if I wake up a couple of hours after I go to sleep then it can be difficult to go back to sleep.

If I turn a light on or switch the computer on then I'm done for the night. I often wake at around 3 or 4 and that's tricky because I think to myself what's the use of trying to go back to sleep. Sometimes I can and sometimes I can't.

I understand that if you're wide awake in the middle of the night it sometimes seems a good idea to get up and do something but if you're up for a couple of hours, maybe get a decaf rather than the regular.

I'm glad you were able to get at least a couple more hours in last night.

thanks so much. i decided no more coffee in the night no matter how much i crave it. have you tried meditation? Mindfulness meditation bring multiple benefits to mental health
i wonder if that could be a solution. I am so sorry that you experience the same thing.
fondly,
bobby

I like the site you posted thank you. I'll explore it more tomorrow. Yes, I have always used a lot of relaxation exercises although I deal with terrible chronic pain and sometimes the pain won't allow me to relax enough for deep enough meditation and the same with yoga... I hurt.

It's like everything though, it takes practice and you need to set aside the time on a regular basis. I used to do Hatha Yoga when I was younger. Loved that.

I don't have a swimming pool here where we're living at the moment but I did in 2 houses we owned. There is an olympic sized public pool at the University not too far away from me but it's not shaded for some strange reason and I can't be in the sun for too long in intense heat even if I'm in the water. It's all too bright for my eyes as well as dangerous for my skin. Otherwise, I think swimming is the best ever method of workout and relaxation. I miss it for now but next time we move we'll make sure we have a little pool. The ocean is close but can't swim in that because of stingers and crocodiles and whatever... :eek: The world didn't seem so dangerous when I was little girl. :rolleyes:

i am so sorry about your pain. How long have you had it? what is it from?
Life sounds so very tough for you. It really sounds as if you have always tried your best which I am so impressed with.
Have you ever tried arnica tablets? They have worked for me and my dog Morgy who had bone cancer. Queen Elizabeth uses homeopathy.
I have to read the article again. I tried to focus on my breathing but couldn't get relaxed, I slept a lot more last night. I kept on waking up but after the first time, i forced myself to stay in bed and intermittently slept. From irritable bowel syndrome i am often bothered by nausea and stomach aches.
I wish it would go away.
i hope you get a pool soon and wow the ocean sounds exciting but so dangerous.
I am going to have coffee but will keep the news off and see if i can sleep some more.
fondly,
bobby

St. Hildegard, a German nun known for her keen observation of nature and physiology, among other things, wrote about the healing properties of the Arnica montana plant in the 12th century. Since at least the 16th century, mountain people in that area have used it to relieve muscle aches and bruises.

Today, Arnica has grown to be one of the most popular homeopathic medicines throughout the world. It is trusted by professional athletes to soothe sore muscles, by prominent cosmetic surgeons to relieve post-procedure pain, and by savvy parents to treat playground bumps and bruises.

Arnica can also be used to relieve stiffness from flying or long-distance driving. And anyone who bruises easily will appreciate Arnica’s ability to reduce bruise discoloration.

To help recover from minor injuries, overexertion, or surgery, Arnica is a must for every medicine cabinet. Whether you are an active baby boomer, a weekend warrior, or a professional athlete, it’s the perfect answer to all of life’s little injuries.

i forgot i found some wise quotes by ataturk if you are interested.

TOP 25 QUOTES BY MUSTAFA KEMAL ATATURK (of 58) | A-Z Quotes

Interesting.What on earth made you think of him?
Every Australian and New Zealander, especially of my generation and before me knows of Ataturk. There is a memorial to Ataturk in Canberra opposite our own war memorial. One quote attributed to him is said at the dawn service at what is now called Anzac Cove in Turkey every year on 25th April.

Very, very famous words from Ataturk reflecting on the loss of our soldiers over the in Turkey.
"Those heroes that shed their blood and lost their lives... you are now lying in the soil of a friendly country. Therefore, rest in peace. There is no difference between the Johnnies and the Mehmets to us where they lie side by side here in this country of ours... You the mothers who sent their sons from far away countries wipe away your tears. Your sons are now lying in our bosom and are in peace. After having lost their lives on this land they have become our sons as well."

War is war. It's all bad.

I have used arnica cream for bruising, however it's very expensive. Not tried it for anything else. I'll look into it.

My pain is caused by my treatment. It's not something that will go away. It is my immune system being ramped up to teach it to fight off the bad tumours. It's quite fascinating how this medication (Pembrolizumab) works but it's very painful. I manage so don't worry about me. All good here. :).

it is definitely worth the pain then.you are brave.
I have a Turkish friend zeynep. the other day she was talking about him. I looked him up and found those exceptional quotes. years ago i saw peter weirs film Gallipoli. i hardly remember it but it was wonderful.
fondly,
bobby

i got more sleep
 

i got at least six hours with interruptions. after coffee am going to try to sleep more. i am still very tired?
i might not get my antidepressant that doesn't work that well. epic rejected it. it is way expensive. hopefully i will find out more today. that was the only one that worked a little. nothing else i tried seemed to work at all.

i won't get an answer for the antidepressent for a while. right now the pharmacy wants over 2400. with epic i paid 20 dollars.

just got a call with no explanation. i only have to pay 20 dollars for aplenzin. big relief.

I'm glad you got it Bobby.

Sorry I've missed you guys my internet went down with the massive
storm we have had.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

glad that you all are okay.
fondly,
bobby

I am sorry that I have been absent bobby.
(((((HUGS)))))
I missed you too.
life has been busy here.
I get to sleep in tomorrow although I do work my 1030 I can't see yet because I don't have md orders yet. he will need to call the office to help get orders.
love you
bizi

relieved that i now have the cat food and aplenzin. last night was brutal

i just received an email that the lost cat food will arrive tomorrow. i called chewy and told them. it is 103.00 dollars. they said to keep it or donate. wow

Bobby

That is great. Its the way Chewy is. Its the way they answer
people when their animals die and they haven't opened the
food and they would just like to return it. They aren't really
worried about the refund just don't want it around.

What they do, is refund the money, and ask the people
to please just send the food to the local shelter. And then
usually they send a card, and if they have a picture of the beloved
animal they then send it too the parents. Its so nice really.

Donna :grouphug::hug:

so impressive

Yes, its something many have commented on. We all love the
way they are doing this.

I'm hoping today has been pretty good for you. Keep warm and
have a good night.

Donna:hug::grouphug:

this is the first time in weeks i haven't woken up depressed. i hope it keeps that way.
fondly,
bobby

I sent an email to an old friend wishing her a happy birthday, i wrote that i finally didn't wake up depressed for weeks. she made no comment. is she a friend? oe is it just always about her.
just got a lovely email from her.

I am sure she appreciated your email, wonderful that you got a nice reply!
maybe you could correspond with her?
and remember not every one does email every day. So don't be so quick to worry about them not returning your email right away.
I am glad that she did though.
love,
bizi

i talk to Linda a lot.on the phone. i wrote early to make sure i didn't wake her up but she responded fast. then i wrote her again but she took her time answering
love,

bobby

now that i am finally getting more sleep i am still always fatigued and often itchy. i wonder if i am suffering long term from the vaccines i took. i can't find anything on the net to help.


Fatigue — a condition characterized by a constant, unrelenting feeling of exhaustion that often develops gradually over time — is very common among the aging population.Oct 2, 2019


How can elderly get more energy?
Eat Foods High in Protein

Instead, go on a high-protein diet, with plenty of lean meats or quinoa. Many vegetables also are high in protein! Boost your energy and protein levels with boiled eggs, which also give you Vitamin D. A diet low in fat and high in protein does wonders for seniors!

Bobby

Not sure where your itching is but use a body lotion and that should
help it. That is what I do its also part of the dry ness of winter and
being inside all the time. When it comes to the tiredness its also
because your cooped up, and need some sunshine, so even if its
just going and standing at the door where your patio is. If the
sunshines there do that a little each day.

Donna :grouphug::hug:

thanks so much. i am afraid to open the terrace door because of my dare devil cat aby. the retractable screen broke last summer i hate to spend the money but super said he would order one for me and i would pay him. maybe i can think 125 dollars chewy saved me will help pay for it.
aby hangs out a lot next to me. i have never been allergic to animals before. mow my nose is itchy and running so much. i looked at amazon and didn't anything i wanted. i do take allergy pills but i don't think they help.
fondly,
bobby

i just tried visine and didn't expect anything.MY NOSE HAS STOPPED ITCHING. i left a message to give to the super to put in the screen door.

Bobby

Also look at it this way, this is one splurge because going outside
is really hard for you. If you can get a screen door and enjoy it more.
Then it will be worth the money. You can then say I splurged just
a little on me and the kitties.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

I still won't let the kitties out but i will also save on ac.
my legs ache so i wonder what the p.t. will say this morning.
fondly,
bobby

Good luck with the maintenance man.
I hope you have a nice day!
love,
bizi

last night i talked with my 29 year old Sam. as i have said he grew up with a bipolar 2 mother and his mother and father divorced when he was seven. they were always fighting. he doesn't think he wants to marry and rather devote himself to his career as a corporate lawyer. afterwards i wound up really depressed. i had opportunities to marry but they would have been such disasters. besides bipolar 2 i have always been independent and also it would have so awful to pass bipolar on to a child. i guess i was lucky even though i missed out so much.

Bobby

The young man Sam, honestly just hasn't meet his sole mate yet.

You need to remember that. And just keep talking to him and
letting him talk to you about what happened. I think honestly
that is the best thing you can do.
If some day he finds someone he wants to live with he will
let you know. And you can help him with this.

And come to terms with things.

Donna

i do so hope you are right. he really has a very difficult family which is still affecting him and also giving him guilt. he is doing so well as a lawyer.
fondly.
bobby

i am very sad. my favorite brilliant witty and holy Rabbi died. I took lectures with him.

I'm so sorry Bobby.

It must have been his time.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

he had been sick for a while but i could never get information. i don't know how old he was or what was wrong.
fondly,
bobby

oh am sorry about your loss.

It is hard to think about him with out grieving.
I am happy that you knew of him for as long as you did.
(((((((HUGS))))))
bizi

thank you so much. i was so fortunate to know him.
love,
bobby

i just heard the cause of saget' death. i guess i was lucky a few months ago when i fell out of the tub and hit my head hard on the toilet bowl. last week when i was in the bathtub and hit my head hard on the back of the bathtub. i wonder when it is going to be my time.
i am worried about sam. my soul mate hung himself from a tree.
last night pudge slept next to me a i grieved the death of Rabbi Mann.. he was such a wonderful man.. i think pudge knows how upset i am. life is so painful.

my rabbi intern wrote me something so comforting.
Bobby- I was so sorry to hear this too. May his memory be a blessing.

That's the sad thing about living. The death of those we know follows us all along the journey. Some people don't experience loss until later in life but others like many of us have experienced loss from a very young age. I'm sorry that you have lost so many from your life in recent times bobby. It must be true though about his memory being a blessing as your Rabbi Intern said, because you have been so affected by his death. :hug: Give your head butting kitty a big cuddle from me. My daughter and I were talking about how much we miss our cuddly friends.