[greta]

I'm absolutely sobbing now. Why have I let an inconsiderate remark from a complete stranger ruin my night?

I belong to a MB for parents adopting from China. It's huge but everyone there is very considerate. One person vented over an inconsiderate remark a person said that their coworker's daughter made and it was pointed out very prominently that the daughter had MS.

The response from some anonymous asshole was. "And to add.... I might have been in a very not-so-happy-friendly state and would have said that the Chinese government doesn't handover any of their babies to someone diagnosed with MS"

My heart is breaking now. My fear is that we won't receive a child. The process has now gone from a wait of 18 months to 5-7 years and my biggest fear is that somewhere along the way, they'll find a way to disqualify us. The line is very long and they've already started weeding out cancer survivors. I'm so vested in this program financially and emotionally that seeing some asshole say in print that people like me don't deserve a child, really tears me up. I just wanted a child. I thought China was a good way to go. Unfortunately, I didn't find out the real story on the program until I was entrenched in it. Now it's awfully hard to get out and I have jerks posting that I shouldn't have a child.

Some of you know that my mouth has a hard time staying closed. I think I was pretty calm in my response, but I made it clear that it was out of line and that people with MS make great parents. Why can't I let this go?

[Curious]

greta, you said it...a$$hole...don't let that one person try and steal your dream or put one cloud over you and your quest to adopt.

so..you just tell that **** wipe..what? the government is going to come and take away the children from people with ms who gave birth?

see my siggy? the picture doc gave me? that person keeps it up..and i'm gonna let out those flying monkeys!

some for later

<-----hands greta a clean hanky.

[Snoopy]

Why can't you let it go?

Because very simply - it hurt, it hurt to the core.

Greta, you would be a very caring and loving mother. Don't let that jerk stomp all over your feelings. He/she doesn't know you, doesn't know about MS and certainly doesn't know what it takes to be a parent....

But you do

I'm sorry I don't know what to tell you about adoption through China but I do understand waiting and worrying in the adoption process even if we did not get through the entire process.

[AfterMyNap]

Aw, Gret, c'mon, rise up. This guy, we'll call him "A-nus" for short, has far worse problems.

Let's take a perfectly objective look at the situation. I suspect that he elected to attack the vulnerable, to tap into your worst fears, to elevate himself.

Now, let's take a purely scientific, biological view of this man, A-nus. He was small as a child, was bullied mercilessly, and often ran home crying to his mother. As he matured (strictly chronologically), he began to realize that his prized piece of anatomy was not keeping up and that his Jockey gerbils were gravely underdeveloped. As he grew into manhood (relatively speaking), he was mocked and abused in locker rooms. As you know, men frequently take inventory to be certain that their friends/brains/security are still intact. Imagine young A-nus's grief at the repeated discovery, during inventory checks, that is efforts yielded an all-but-empty warehouse.

Next, a look at our precious Miss Gretata. You are an intelligent, educated, accomplished, loving, fun-filled, sensible, joyful, content, happily married woman who has all the benefits of successful American living.

Compare A-nus and his trivial weakness as exposed by his need to flaunt his ignorance while trying to crush the spirits of others like you. No contest! He will go to bed every night and wake every morning with the disappointment of his teeny-weeny-peeny, while you, my dear Greta, can rest well knowing that you have a wonderful life, a wonderful future, a wonderful husband who loves you (and look gooood in uniform), and that if it is meant to be, a child in the loving fold of your marriage.

Finally, it is said that we cannot hate those for whom we are praying, so how about PMing A-nus and let him know that AMN is praying for his pathetic penis.

Feel better, dear Greta, your life is worth so much more and you are proof of that.

[SallyC]

Oh Greta, What a stupid, thoughtless thing for a person to say. Do like AMA says and consider the source...Mr. A-nus.

Don't let this person rain on your parade. If God wants you to have a baby then that's the way it's gonna be...understand, sweety?

More Hugs

[Jappy]

Good Morning Greta: My heart goes out to you and the child this Asssssss
Is trying to prevent you from adopting.

Just as AMN said this guy is full of problems. You would make a great mother. That is what the problem sometime is when a person has a health problem and you have these ++++++ (won't say ) and they think they know it all. They are the ones that make the undsireable parents.


If it is meant to be God will give you the child that you are longing for.

Praying for you. Joyce

[greta]

I feel better now, especially after laughing my butt off at AMN's comment. I went back this morning. The person admitted that they have no tact, but that it was ok, since it was a vent thread. Oh yeah, and English is their second language. WTF???? They did note that they know people with MS can be good parents. Too bad this **** is months ahead of me in line.

AMN, you'll probably need to rethink the whole package theory. He is a she!

[AfterMyNap]

Originally Posted by greta

I feel better now, especially after laughing my butt off at AMN's comment. I went back this morning. The person admitted that they have no tact, but that it was ok, since it was a vent thread. Oh yeah, and English is their second language. WTF???? They did note that they know people with MS can be good parents. Too bad this **** is months ahead of me in line.

AMN, you'll probably need to rethink the whole package theory. He is a she!

AHA!!!


'Ziss iss exoctly vot I vuz saying, ya'???

[SallyC]

Originally Posted by AfterMyNap

AHA!!!


'Ziss iss exoctly vot I vuz saying, ya'???

[Chris]

Hello Greta,
I'm so terribly sorry to hear what one bad apple can say to ruin your wonderful hopes and thoughts of adopting from overseas. I haven't read what anyone else wrote but, all I have to say is this person is totally ignorant about MS, so why even listen to what they have to say? It sounds like they have had a bad experience and are projecting it onto anyone else who potentially will be an adoptive and good parent to a child from another country.

PLEASE don't feel alone, or even listen to such rubbish! As you may know this year my husband and I are determined to start the quest to find a baby and start our own family. I've heard so many hurtful things about why I shouldn't be a mother because of this disease that I think I've started turning male because I've deveopled quite a sense of "selective hearing". You know what a terrific Mum you will make. Nobody but you and your husband know that, so don't waste anymore time or tears thinking about other's stupidity. This person is just an angry bitter vetch who doesn't deserve your time and thought.

Good luck to you on your journey! I'd love to talk to you someday about what you've done so far in your quest to adopt from overseas. We are just beginning the journey, and it's a daunting one at that. But, I don't want this to be a negative experience for us. For someday when we are a family, I want to be able to tell my child about his or her wonderful journey into our family, and I hope you will be able to do the same thing very soon as well!

Thinking of you always,
Chris