You might use the phone book and start calling the help line numbers- usually in the front of the book.
Look for government agencies, churches, food banks, charities

South Carolina family services
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q...=Google+Search
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q...es&btnG=Search

North Carolina family services
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q...es&btnG=Search
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q...es&btnG=Search

Thank you for helping. I know I'm a much better parent then her father. He is what one calls a dead beat. Hasn't wked since 2001... A mothers boy and has now put mother above his child. He refused his last weekend, most of Easter and I'm told will not be taking her on his next either. Usually that would be great, but I need the time off to get better.

I'm taking care of her basic needs, but much of nothing more since I got sick. I think it is the sick deal that is making me even consider giving her up, but I've changed my mind. She will stay with me. I am so tired all the time and I can't sleep. Major problem. No the stupid neuro will not give pills. I'm switching on the 15th.

Yes, I have emily lined up to see a psycoanalist (sp) I did this a few days ago. I looked for help a long time back but none in this area so forget that. We don't even have a big sister program and zip for help around the house...

I think I'll be ok now. I needed to vent hear some real people with real advice.

Thank You So Much

Sheena

I'm so glad you posted an update. Please don't make a kneejerk decision on the spur of the moment that will be difficult to reverse.

How old is your daughter? Can anyone at school help - maybe they know of some programs in your area that can assist?

Some days I feel so bad and hurt so much that I think I can't do anything but lie on the couch. 24 hours later I'm fine. That's the nature of this beast....

Be honest with your daughter - give her the chance to help you. She will learn responsibility and compassion.

I hope today is a better day. We're all here for you.....

Sheena - Thank you so much for updating us. I am glad things settled down a bit for you.

You will be fine. Give yourself some time to work things out.

As HK said, some days are really bad and others are really good.

I'm also glad you will be going to a new neuro. Hopefully he/she will be able to get you on the right track so that you can feel better.

No problem on the venting. We are here to help you.

Sheena, I was thinking about this after I posted this morning and thought of some things that might be helpful to you as you don't have the resources around you to help. (Here I go with a list again. LOL)

1. Keep easy prep meals on hand for your "down" times. I always have those on hand for when DDs have to cook. Sometimes they are pre-packaged things like orange chicken and easy prep rice that you just put in the microwave. Sometimes when I cook, I cook larger meals and freeze the rest for these days. I'll make a large pot of chili and what we don't eat I freeze in single size portions.

2. Take advantage of places that deliver food, meds, and other necessities. If your local grocery does not deliver food Amazon has a whole grocery section. I know that it may cost a little for shipping but the prices are close to what they are in the store and you save some energy.

There are other sites that deliver things like tp, shampoo, toothpaste, etc. I have found these to be a little bit cheaper than what is in the store.

You can also have your meds delivered.

Generally, I don't do this as DDs can drive.

3. Teach DD how to cook simple things. When DDs were about your DDs age I taught them how to make simple things so that when they were at their dad's I knew that they would be able to fix themselves something to eat. I even taught them how to use the stove and cook eggs.

4. Try to spend 10 minutes or less a day "straightening" up the house. Make a game of it with DD. Again DDs are older, but every evening before bed we straighten up and wipe the counters down. It takes all of 5 minutes but it makes a huge difference over all. Things don't get out of hand and overwhelming.

5. Take 5 to 10 minutes everyday to come on here for support. (I just had to throw that in there. LOL)

Anyone else have some time and energy saving tips for Sheena?

Great idea, T.

I have been a single mom to my two girls for most of their lives, and they are (almost) 16 and 12 now. I have had no support what-so-ever from my family, but my ex is good with them (generally only when it suits him though ). It's not easy, Sheena, but definitely can be done . . .

Some ideas to add to the list:

1. Have play dates with other kids when you are able to, so that you can have breaks sometimes when you need them. (I take several kids to their sports so that I can lean on others when things are bad...).

2. Give an allowance for chores, and plan to take your daughter out to spend it on a certain day. It is incentive for her to keep up the good work.

3. Find church camps that might help pay for her to go away a few weeks during the summer.

4. Do the grunt-cleaning 10 - 20 minutes each day instead of doing it all at once. For instance, my toilet is never scrubbed the same time as the counters or tub, because I do only one job in there each day. (I clean the tub when I am showering actually).

5. I found that my kids were way easier to manage when they had a friend over to play with . . . otherwise they got too bored.

6. Teach her to be quiet when you need to rest, then plan to spend a bit of quality time with her when you have the energy. She'll get used to the routine.

Cherie

Awesome idea! Not only will they help with camps but with other things as well. Our church has help with scholarships for DDs to go on retreats and such. As well as one year the Youth Group bought me groceries. Brought tears to my eyes.

Additionally, I know that where I live the NMSS has a camp for kids whose parents have MS. They do it in the summer and I think it is a week long camp. You might want to call your local NMSS chapter and ask about it. It will give you a weeks rest.

At DDs high school they have a club that does volunteer activities. You could certainly call the high school and see if there is a h.s. student that could come help. If anything, they could play with dd for a few hours to give you a break and dd would be thrilled to have a big kid come play with her.

yes i know this is a lot of this is easier said than done, but when you do prepare meals I use to always make extra and freeze extra servings at least two extra,my freezer would have approx 6 days of meals in it for the kids, so that the boys were always, fed all i would have to do was nuke it and serve and as time got on they could even nuke em themeselves. see if you have a local pantry too that can help with food and then maybe through the pantry, they could help direct you, i know how down you were last night, and am thankyou for the more upbeat notes I am reading today, but as you said we are not in your shoes and the decision is ultimatly yours and it when made will be finale. hang in there, i use to be pretty negative about the light at the end of the tunnel was always an on coming train, its not always an on coming train, sometimes it is light at the end of the tunnel, a bright and glorious light i put in as many hugs as the script would allow me too

United Way's First Call for Help

You can google this for your area or see if they have a telephone number. They are in most communities. Just tell them what type of assistance you are needing and they have agency listings they can give you.