I appreciated Cherie's comment.

Although I don't think I would've said ignorant things to people, my perception of MS was also very inaccurate, prior to doctors considering it as a dx for me.

My only knowledge of it was when I did a visit with a pastor once, to a woman with MS who was bed-bound.

It's easy for us to expect others to have more knowledge and to educate themselves, but, how much did we know about MS prior to our own personal experiences with it?

I acknowledge that, maybe it is easy for me to be positive because I have been fortunate enough not to run into people (either strangers, acquaintances or relatives) who have said ignorant things to me.

If I did, I would likely try to educate those who seemed genuinely concerned or interested, and try to end the conversation quickly, but politely, to those who didn't.

~ Faith

Here's my best advice...

Whether it's MS or anything else you don't want to address...when someone asks me a question I don't want to answer, I do just that - I don't answer. They usually ask a second time, at which point I may look directly at them for a couple of seconds, then go back to what I was doing. If they haven't gotten the message at that point, they will after the third time.

The point is this: why become uncomfortable? Let them become uncomfortable, if that's what it takes. Whatever, just maintain control of how you want to feel. If you start trying to come up with a response to a question that you'd prefer to not answer, then you are giving control of your mental state to someone else. Never allow that to happen.

It doesn't have to be confrontational; in fact, it can even be amusing. Now, occasionally someone will take offense at your measured silence. Just keep your control and only respond if you feel like it. My final comment, all other things failing, would simply be, "I don't want to discuss it."

You're not on the witness stand - you don't have to engage anyone if you don't want to. Your mind is your own, private space.

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I like your approach. Why do we always feel the need to try and not make other people uncomfortable....even if their actions are making us uncomfortable?

If I don't feel like an ignorant person, I normally will just tell Cindy I can't talk now and will call her later when I can.









I know that'll hurt later

i know how your mind can go blank in the moment.
sometimes i use a comment for a teachable moment but it depends on the circumstances.

after a while you get more immune to stupidity.

I agree.

Some people ask things with the best of intentions, and - speaking only for myself - I would probably try to respond kindly to a heartfelt question, rather than ignoring it or becoming aggressive. But I would certainly stonewall a question or comment from a stupid person - I just wouldn't let myself become upset in the process.

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EXACTLY!!!