Feeling down and useless....
For the past 3 days I've been curled up in a ball feeling like this also. Well, I've been ill too, so I guess that's part of it.
I was just sharing this with a very good friend - the fact that I feel like I'm 'fading'......literally. I see my family and friends getting on fine and my kids are becoming more and more independent (which is good) and it's as tho I'm slowly fading out of the picture. It's a very empty, cold feeling with extreme sadness. Alot of us do struggle with depression and I think it's good to talk about....for me anyway. It somehow helps.
The strangest part about this feeling is, deep down, I think I 'want' to fade out. I get in these frames of mind where I'd just rather throw in the towel rather than continuing on and on and onnnnn every single day battling this pain nightmare that has consumed our lives.

It's like I wanna just get on over to the 'other' side, where there is no more suffering. Am I making any sense?
But then, a 'good' day will roll around and these feelings subside for awhile....and then it all starts all over again.

Sorry, didn't mean to get so 'deep'.....but just felt compelled to share, Karen, especially since we both know that feeling of being 'useless'.
I know this is not true, tho.....we ARE useful and needed and loved. We have a purpose here and there are people who really need us.

Being sick sure messed me up. Since I was sick to my stomach, I wasn't able to take my regular meds (head meds ) and boy, my mind really started playing games with me. That's when all these dark thoughts came along. It's been aweful.
But, by talking about it, like I did with my friend and asking for prayer, it helps alot. It's not a sign of weakness at all. It's proof that we all need this fellowship.

I hope you feel better soon and when Thursday rolls around, you'll start to feel like things are beginning to get sorted once and for all.

Caring as Always,
Rae

Sorry you are feeling so bad, saffy & Rrae. I wish I could cheer you both up or bake you a pie, or something! (I know a pie wouldn't help, but it's the first thing that popped into my head)

How about this:http://www.pamperedprimatesandk9s.com/store.php?cat=2? It's a web store for monkey, marmoset, lemur, and tamarin clothes.

Check out the photo album: http://www.pamperedprimatesandk9s.com/photos.php It's cute and weird...it's cweird!

Sorry if that didn't help either, but I had to try.

Saffy, I was someone who looked at your first post but didn't reply...to answer your question as to why, I didn't have an answer, but was hoping that I might learn something from someone else.

Bots make me think of creepy crawly little things..... Anyway Saffy, you are in my prayers, and there is NO BOT about that!

Yup,
No Bot,
Mark56

Just going to toss a quick idea out there. I get leg spasms sometimes, and I can usually tell that they are going to happen a day or so in advance because the muscles clench up. If I eat a banana it helps bring my potassium back in line and I can usually avoid the cramps. Lisa

My advise is to take the muscle relaxers, but in order to have them work all the time you have to take them all the time. A conundrum for sure. I'm still at the stage of the game where I'm taking boatloads of meds to manage my pain. I am hoping there will be a day when I'm only on them for flareups - if anything. I recently tried some different musce relaxers: both baclofen and skelaxin didn't do much at all, Soma worked but I was a zombie on it and now I'm back to Flexeril, my trusty med of some 14 years and I'm now able to use it only twice a day compared to three times a day before. I had to go off it and try some others so I could substantiate my claim to my prescription company that I needed the brand name of Flexeril (I'm allergic to an ingredient in the generics of this med). Anyway, I discovered that Flexeril did work the best for me. It is sedating but not as much as the Soma, and it does work well. I don't know how fast it works though, sounds like you need something to work quickly as you don't take it continuously.

I do have a lotion compounded (made by my pharmacy just for me) it is a lotion having amitypaline 5 mg and lidocaine 5 mg - I rub it in to where I'm hurting and it does take the pain away really fast. I carry a teeny bit in my purse for when I am out. Let me know if you need specifics for this. I hope things will settle down for you!