ginnie
my angel
i will call your voice is upbeat
i could use a good sound
do you know what i mean
i think you do
love you
me

I am upbeat for sure these days. Even with the stress. Will tell you whats up over the phone. Have something to look forward to. Pain or no, I am going!
I think about you dear woman, may pain pass this day. Always you are in my prayers....xginnie

dear Father
Brother
Mother Mary

thank you for another day

the sermon what i needed
the Love is real
i am the one who
has no clue what i
am talking about

what is going on
what is your message
my Father
help me
accept the things i cannot change
i am in control only for myself
that was a very long time ago

Jesus i trust you
show me the way
in the name of our
Father
Amen

Brother
Mother Mary

thank you for today
a difficult day as a male
friend helped me go to
the hospital
took forever
even taking care of everything
the night before
Corissa was not home at
the time i got home
my friend picked her up
from the library
this is new hang out
it would have been okay
another day she was told to come
home as i was going to need her help
my blood work taken
because someone did not ask
me questions
such as do you suffer from high blood pressure
the aorta to my stomach has been noted to
have calcification
my knees are so bad
told my pain specialist
gave me a steroid shot in
left knee even though both
are equal in pain but this
will help me see if the injection
is working
got my refill scripts
also told him my knees
woke me up in tears @2:30
i have gotten so tired over the
last couple of months
took a 5 mg short term
went back to sleep
will have the MRI
with/without contrast
then my skin Dr. to check for
skin cancer spending my time
in the summer at the pool
next week other Dr. appointments
thank you brother
thank you to my good friend
who i knew as a customer
when i waitress ed in my more than
a decade of serving thousands
and thousands in that time
he is someone who still is in love with me
and he is now married with 2 girls
Father only you know my heart
as i believe
in Jesus name
i love you
amen!

Father
Brother
Mother Mary
Friends

thank you for another

Eva is doing well
her happy face glows
first thing in the morning
i will miss when she has
a room long term rehab/with child
until then any who follow know the
love i have
blessed i am
my grandchild takes me away
she is taken care of plays
my friend who drove us to the hospital
was amazed at her vocabulary for a 2 1/2
year
she really is gifted
i see it
i hope my interaction has as i know
we Corissa and myself
more me now as Corissa has a girlfriend
i have yet to have her and dad to come
to my home
yes i do still act on old school
requirements
already spoke with her on what i learned
is face time
her mother cannot keep her hands
from hurting her
dad was working there now
is a case open with child protection
better known as DYFS
(division youth and family services)
this is our situation also
as my daughter struggles with addiction
she was still in hospital when
she called
she was having a stress test
walking the treadmill
wants to come over and see
her child if released
told her she may take tricycle
in front there is now a cemented
area where a pool used to be
point
i told her yes
till then
one day at a time
with my heart in the lords hands
as i hold on to one of them
blessed are the sick
the meek the old who have
no one to care for or help
this i pray for
the weak
the weak minded
the loss of life and still
live and loose their memory
i think of that as i forget more
and more med and stress induced
not good for anyone
lord hear our prayers
all in all we got things done
on my list to do physicians
i must see
thank you for your
multitude of blessings

in you i trust
AMEN!

There is Blessing in not feeling nerve pain in my arm.
In this I feel RICH!
It is quite a thing when pain has been so horrific.......
then it is just gone, vanished.
People who walk the face of this planet not suffering nerve pain
are truly RICH indeed.
Yes.
Truly.

Another Blessing is the knowledge Friends gather around to support,
whether in person in the corporeal presence at home....
OR
here in this Blessed place.
Friends are another way in which I feel RICH.
Case in point,
during my convalescence this week,
a friend from work brought lunch,
yum,
Bar-b-Q
and we talked of things at work.
This was a good time of sharing friendship.
Indeed.

I am Blessed,
RICH in Blessings.

Ahhhhhhhh.............

You know what else, I was thus RICH even in the darkest of times
deeply affected by that nerve pain.
So, it is good to have this place to share.

Hug for the room.

Father
Brother
Mother Mary
Friends

thank you for another day

to know our Father is forever forgiving
and how things go on in the day
where we fall short
get tempered hot because
i am not happy about many things
i must always remember
his will be done
we are forgiven time and time again
to be spirit filled person
to believe and trust
it is planned now we must
do the foot work
i will try oh so hard not
to be angered by my pain
too not have pain when reaching
up to shampoo my hair
to all the once a week 1 or 2
hours to myself
as it has gotten harder to even
shave my legs
jeez i am not me if i can't
get the few things i need
to do for myself
maybe paint these toenails
can't reach
will have someone do it for me
CORISSA right up her alley

weak am i most of the time
but sometimes between
leaving the rest of the house
up to my daughter
and even that
a beautiful view of the Southeast and Southwest
i must do what must be done bathrooms
kitchen living and dining room need upkeep
i enjoy making my home look and feel awesome
happy to hear when i get complemented
i need to get a single coat back on the walls
all the saw dust covered the entire apartment
Christine and Eva moved with us as they were
with me
to tackle the veranda i thought some playful art work by the baby
oh yeah
sounds great
with love
remember what it was like
oh how she blesses us

Father
Brother
Mother Mary

thank you for another day

lonely i am
my family
oh my family
yesterday was a big time phone day
managed to get much done
while in bed re-cooping
my throat is still very irritated
but anyway
i just got a phone call from my eldest
Lord as Only You know what is in my heart
i will Pray for my daughter
i will Pray for my sister
and the rest
Father
my sister in a good but very bad way
she is kicking dope
a drug that takes a physical hold on ones body
she is reaching out to me as i pray the tools i was
given in sobriety was more than i can be truly
be grateful for my obsession is lifted after 23 years
my sis is needing my help

my daughter i was able to tell her
the policy lapsed
pointing the finger still on me
all i had to say
it wasn't for me
and it was only good upon death
to the last policy i have
i will turn over to
Corissa
told her it was ultimately my fault
if i never did it
it wouldn't be a problem

my whole life it is me who has
always consoled whoever it be

Father help me help them
as i can only be available
for them when i am doing
well
step by step
sometimes inch by inch

i know it i lived it
in hindsight since being a little girl
we were so lucky
no truly the angels
had to have been there
to watch over us
some of the crazy crazy things
left to our own defenses

where did that time go
i didn't get a chance to play
i wanted to play
we did find time to
do stupid daring things
that make me cringe
oh yeah
the angels were with us

today another doctor
woman dr. yearly check-up
is i believe in preventive
health care
my mammo went well
as i wrote to all on a different
thread "women health"


got to view
as we all know the spinal vertebrae
should look like sandwiches stacked
on top of each other
l-4 nothing between the bread (disk)
same with l-5 most painful
and l-6 the same

i could not make out a darn thing
in the cervical region
things seem all disheveled
now i am all ready to be seen
by a new chief orthosurgeon
we will see what he has to say
i remember my surgeon
asking just like this
remember i came to him
chief complaint neck
after tests and film
"so which do you want to do first"
i remember looking at him puzzled
and finally said
"i am here for my neck"
you would think i would have
re thought who i was dealing with

enough about myself
my daily prayer
for all to experience a belly laugh
in there day where all around you are chiming
in the laugh

my sister hasn't called yet
the man she married moved out at her
request as she is madly in love with him
but understands he must go
in replacement she has her ex-husband
move back in with her my nephews father
for him i am hopeful for to have dad back
and yes she loves him also
however her true love is her now addict husband

i am aware of the craziness
i never held back about the truth
of my family and dynamics

i must and will always be there
wherever i am needed and i can Help
not Enable

i feel much better of the LEXEPRO
AND DECIDED NOT TO TAKE ANY
MEDS THAT I DO NOT WANT
I NEED TO FEEL
NOT ENTERTAIN THE DEVIL

hoping to have a stress free day
i have a ride to and from the doctors
thanks to an old friend
who i come to find
he always loved me
no not someone i would bring into my life now
but a friend none the less

thank you for allowing me to share

Father
Brother
Mother Mary

thank you for another day

father it has been a full week of doctors
now DYFS will be coming today
little Eva's guardian
my mind is ready only wish my body
could follow
Monday is court
with all that is going on
sisters taking the bus to come home
here and be present when they come
will pray as always i am in constant
dialogue with heavenly Father and Son
Mother Mary keep this baby safe from
any evil
as it tries to slither it's way through us
as i
in the name of my brother Jesus Christ
i rebuke any evil doing
i believe my brother is our Savior
his prayers make beautiful music
to my heart
may the judge be understanding of All
the facts
interesting it will be
one thing i know for sure
i will be sad once mom and baby are in re-hab
i know in my mind i understand what must be done
i shall miss my grandchild soooooooooooooooooooo
much it started the tears already
a go she is at that age 2 1/2 years old
a beautiful time if not the best time with all my children
i was still am a great mom and a greater grandmother
it is true
becoming a grandmother and guardian to Eva for her
mother to have sobriety under her belt
she too is not in a healthy way
as a diabetic she must watch her diet
and now her most recent hospital visit
and not on her meds as the lack of insurance
she is a candidate to be a stroke victim as the
blood pressure given for the kidney that the
diabetes attacks now her heart has become dependent
on them
so all prays to these situations i ask
Lord hear our prayers
Amen!

[COLOR="Red"]Hugz to you m[y friend
/COLOR]