[smae]

Originally Posted by MelodyL

And I wonder if tomorrow, someone is going to say to me "wow, sprouting sounds like fun!!


lol

It DOES sound like fun! It's crazy how fast they grow! But, I have no idea what they really are.. what they taste like.. I didn't know that sprouts were made from more than one type of food/seed/whatever! It's hard to believe that they are that easy to grow... I never see them anywhere!

[MelodyL]

Originally Posted by smae

It DOES sound like fun! It's crazy how fast they grow! But, I have no idea what they really are.. what they taste like.. I didn't know that sprouts were made from more than one type of food/seed/whatever! It's hard to believe that they are that easy to grow... I never see them anywhere!

I wonder if you will click on this link

http://www.sproutpeople.com/

and learn ABSOLUTELY everything you need to learn about Melody's hobby!!!

You'll love it.

Mel

[Alffe]

I wonder that " It DOES sound like fun! It's crazy how fast they grow! But, I have no idea what they really are.. what they taste like.. I didn't know that sprouts were made from more than one type of food/seed/whatever! It's hard to believe that they are that easy to grow... I never see them anywhere!"

I wonder how much more light comes into our yard since the utility company came yesterday and "butchered" our fir trees...

I wonder if I can admit that like smae, I have never eaten sprouts...when we see them on food, my dh says it looks like hair....

I wonder what little critter is chewing on our wiring and what it's going to cost to get it fixed....

I remember when our repair guy was working on the summer kitchen, tightening everything up and a little flying squirrel jumped on his shoulder and ran down his arm.......same guy coming Thursday...

[Addy]

I wonder if the "Thread Police" (our dear marshmallow friend) will allow this special wonder thread (so much sharing and caring!) to continue on to page 4...

I wonder how successful my 2nd interview was and that now its up to me to provide them with my references tomorrow - the final step in the process.

I wonder that the mommy of Grand-Addy (LOL... I just typed Grand-doody!!!) ... is making choices which take her away from her doll-baby. I wonder that I am choosing to make this a positive thing as it allows me to be a loving gramma

I wonder at how simplifying it is to my life when I chose not to react with anger ... which in turn leads to sadness... which in turn leads to those beat-me-up thoughts...

I wonder at how difficult it is to make the positive choices when the depression demon creeps in...

I am wondering if, dear Alffe, it matters not that you remember the funeral... but that you remember Michael and I would love to help you honour him here. Have you ever scanned all his photos and put them together with music - I am wondering if I can do that for you? I wonder if you know I am very serious about this....

I wonder if you'll all join me in a new thread which I'm going to start for our Goofy-sis :grouphug

I wonder that I'm looking forward to a lovely day off, the windows are open, the sun is shining, the fall colours are beautiful, the washing is on and there are pictures to hang....

Addy

[smae]

I wonder why I bother to ever say "things can't get any worse, so the only way is up" because I have been saying that for three weeks and every single day, something worse happens.

I wonder if my heart will ever stop racing from 3 hours of frantically trying to reach my mom, finding out she isn't at work, not answering calls... and thinking that since she isn't in the ER or hospital... there is nothing else to think but that she is very seriously hurt or dead.

I wonder if that makes me sound like a maniac.. to jump to such conclusions.. but I know that if any of you knew my mom at all, you'd totally understand that not being able to reach her for 3 straight hours is very unlike her.

I wonder if she is telling the truth when she finally called to tell me she is okay, and she said she is upset, but not at me... I wonder why I absolutely cannot believe that, and feel as if it is all my fault.

I wonder what happened and how she explained to her boss that she was so incredibly upset that she was leaving work around 11 am and not coming back all day--when her boss doesn't even let her leave for an hour.

I wonder what happened to me last night in my sleep. The pain in my feet is totally normal, but waking up with such horrendous back pain is unusual... yes, there are 5 things wrong with my back and I have lots of pain.. BUT I walk hunched over today and can barely move because the pain is so extreme.

I wonder if I can postpone talking to a Bible study group tonight about my ideas for starting a ministry to reach out to the chronically ill/disabled people in our community.. because I have been crying (more like sobbing hysterically) for 4 hours and I just want to bury myself under blankets and tell the world to leave me alone.

I wonder what life would be like today if the majority of my friends wouldn't have walked away when this awful pain started.. I wonder, would I have someone to call or chat with online right now, when all I need a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on? I wonder if I still wouldn't be suffering in silence..

I wonder if there is any way to ease this pain... the only thing that gives me relief for back pain is a heating pad, and I am no longer allowed to use one... ice doesn't help... I wonder if anyone out there has any ideas to help me.

I wonder if, when my mom comes home, it will be calm and peaceful, or like WWIII.. I wonder if, by not working this afternoon (and part of morning) and talking to a friend, if she has gotten it out of her system and will be okay... or if tonight will be a struggle for her--and/or for me

I wonder if my mom truly knows that I do love her and will love her and support her no matter what...

I wonder if she realizes that what I said is true.. I can love and support her but still be hurt or angry at her for things she has done... and that doesn't mean I won't be there for her or that I will love her any less.. but if I don't speak truthfully about the things that hurt me, it is just enabling her (or anyone else) to continue to hurt me and others..

I wonder how much of the house is covered in cat poop. Gross, right? (I went to the kitchen earlier to get some water and there was cat poop on the kitchen floor and the dining room floor.. I imagine it was stuck on a paw when one of the 3 cats left the litter box.. but because of both the neuropathy (which makes me so unstable) and my horrible back pain today, I could not bend over and pick up each cat... or clean up the mess. My mom told me to just leave it til she gets home, but I wonder if that means that they have spread the yuckiness to other places in the last 4-5 hours.)

I wonder why it is so easy to go from encouraging others one day, even with all my present struggles.. and now today I don't feel I can encourage anyone... even myself.

I wonder what it's called when a person is extremely discouraged, frustrated, hurt, angry, overwhelmed, and sad.. but not all the time. I wonder, when it is circumstantial, if it is still considered depression (because when I think of depression, I think of a long term, most of the time thing... not just being sad when there is something major goign on).. or if there is a better word to describe how I feel today.

I wonder if anyone has read my whole list of wonders... I doubt it, but applaud anyone who was even able to skim it.

I wonder what I will do for the next several hours... being so upset and needing so badly to talk to someone...

I wonder how everyone else is doing and hoping and praying that they are having an easier day than I am.

[barbo]

You are very brave and very strong to stand up to your mother's behavior. Keep talkin' - we hear you. Love, Barbo

[Addy]

I wonder if you know I DO hear you dear smae.... and I DO think that your life circumstances have exacerbated your depression... yes, you are depressed.

I wonder if you ever use a "magic bag" ... you heat them in the microwave (or keep them in the freezer)... for hot or cold, I find them marvelously relieving... and they even serve the purpose of cooling me down or heating me up!

I wonder if you can excuse yourself from events such as the planning to be a youth pastor when your insides are upside down ....

I wonder if I can remind everyone of David's signature .... Take Care of YOU!

[smae]

I wonder how to explain to Addy and everyone else that while this may be a bit of depression going on, I am not depressed... not always, not usually, not normally. That's all I am trying to convey--the last three weeks have been very difficult because some horrible things have happened within my immediate family--medical problems including a surgery and a horrible addiction, a car accident, flooded basement (twice), severe pain, fights, emotional pain, major financial problems (such as having $700 worth of bills due for October and absolutely no money), etc etc etc. I'm not afraid to admit I'm depressed or ashamed of it... or anything like that. I struggled greatly with depression back in high school. BUT.. this is not clinical depression where I always feel down or hopeless or struggle.. this is very much based on circumstances and will pass. It may still be depression--I don't know. That's what I am wondering.. what to call it.. depression is usually a lasting thing.. and this is circumstantial. I don't really care what it is called, but it's hard to explain to people that I do not struggle with depression not even a little bit... except all these things are going on right now and they are tough. I don't necessarily think that going through major hardships equal depression.. just tough times.

I wonder if the girls that came with the Bible study tonight took anything I said and pondered it.. if it made any kind of difference in their lives. I may never know, but I do wonder...

I wonder what I will do if my mom goes away for a month or more, since I am unable to care for my most basic needs.

I wonder if BMW has come and gone... I tried to get on sooner, but the girls just left a few minutes ago.

I wonder why my back pain chose today to flair up. I haven't had this much back pain in well over a year.. and I can't stand up straight. Ow.

I wonder why it has taken me an hour to write this--oh wait, I KNOW why! Phone calls, checking on my mom, text messages, MSN conversations.... haha

I wonder if I dare say that tomorrow will have to be better than today... because everytime I say that lately it has not been true.. but I truly think there is a tiny bit of light at the end of this tunnel..

I wonder if I can say thank you to all the wonderful people here.. and give them s for caring so much.

I wonder how soon I can go to bed! zzzzz

[Alffe]

I wonder if Addy knows that she brought me to tears with her kind offer....

I wonder how I could do that...Michael's "life" is in two scrap books..one begins with his birth certificate and hospital baby picture....it ends with the police report of his death. I don't know how to scan or maybe I've just forgotten how to...Michael's memories are inside my heart...inside a lot of people hearts and this world is not a better place without him in it...but I thank you Addy for wanting to help me...you do help me..all of you help me...

I wonder if smae knows what an incredible person she is...I wonder if she's ever read the piece about "forgiving our parents"....I'll try to find it..

I wonder if smae is an only child...wonder if we are talking about an addiction here.....not trying to be nosey...just want to help.

I wonder that the tree trimmers came back and took another swipe at our trees....

I wonder if they will return today..

I wonder why men are so macho....

I wonder if Addy's magic bag is filled with rice???

[smae]

I wonder why I forgot to comment on Addy's suggestion on the bag to cool or heat up... The only thing that helps my back pain is heat... and I am not allowed to use any source of heat--heating pad, hot tub, bag of -whatever- in the microwave. I should have specified that, but wasn't thinking clearly. Heat is all that helps, but because I am on the fentanyl pain patch, I'm not allowed to use heat. If my body temperature raises, it will release too much of the medication before it is supposed to, and I could end up overdosing... so unfortunately, I am not allowed to use warmth to help.. and that is what I so desperately need!

I wonder what Alffe is talking about as far as forgiving our parents... and I wonder if I can respond and tell Alffe that I am not an only child, but that I am the only child around here and the only child at home with my mom.

I wonder if I haven't come right out and said it or not... but yes, this all revolves around an addiction (to alcohol)... not MY addiction... but hers.

I wonder why people are so surprised that at 24, I have never had even a sip of alcohol... when I've been watching it destroy lives and families since I was born.

I wonder if it is a good sign that I am feeling a lot better today.. and I wonder if things are going to get better, or if I am blind and this is just another "calm before the storm". I am praying and hoping with everything in me that things are changing for the good.

I wonder how in the world I will care for myself though if I AM left alone for a month or more... I wonder how I will shower in that month since I can't do it alone.. I wonder how my cats will get fresh water and how the litterbox will be cleaned since I can't do those things. I wonder if my mom knows that while I worry about what will happen if she leaves, that even if I have to go a month without a shower and hardly eat anything in the next month (since I can't shop or cook).. that I don't really care... that I just want her to get better.

I wonder where all three of my cats are, because I've only seen once since I woke up and he disappeared some time ago... quiet cats is not always a good thing.

I wonder why I am feeling like I haven't slept in three days.. when I have.

I wonder how everyone's day is going to far... and wonder who will come and share their thoughts next.