I'm glad you found something that helps. I find that Serroquel reeeeeally helps me sleep at night. I NEED sleep. Lack of sleep was one factor that put me in the psych hospital. I have since created a routine, i.e. setting a two hour window for bedtime, and taking the meds around then. It has really helped.

Sleep is so important.

I also do not want to go back to the hospital, we can make it. The thoughts and feelings are so powerful, but we can find ways to cope with them-I know it sounds so corny and redundant, but anything to stay out of the hospital and continue recovery. How are you doing today?

~S

Am visiting my mother today. So I am playing normal but not inside. Had a great week at an enlightenment intensive seminar from which I decided that my mood is low and I got a referral to a new psychiatrist. Will probably mean yet another drug trial but fact is I cannot keep living like this. So we shall see. Gotta go. Will be back online later tonight as I am struggling. Mom doesn't need to know right now. I shall be back later for a good chat with whomever is still here. Thanks all!

The beast, the beast is back. So strong.

Feeling alone. Not in danger right now but the cycle is shorter and stronger now. I think I might give in and go to hospital in the morning. I just can't fight any longer and I know if I do not get help I will attempt again. Just have to get to morning.

Hi Zenda, I'm here if you need some-one to talk to, or can you access the chat room?

Hey thanks everyone. I will be calling my doc this am to find out if the referral to the. ES psychiatrist has gone through then making a decision about whether to go to hospital. I have had such bad experiences there. But yeah I am aware that the alternative is pretty untenable too. I did not go to the chat room last night because I forgot that I could now that I am not monitored. Duh. Certainly will in future. Or maybe right now. I am not really 'puter savvy. Lol!

Please trust your instincts and go to the hospital this morning.

Now I remember why I can't go into the chat rooms. I am on my iPhone and I can't download flash player to it which is needed to get into the chat. C'est la vie...

Dear friends, there are cycles and there are cycles....somedays are more tolerable, some are worse. It seems the days are so long, and the nights longer. You are not alone...even if I do not know you, I know how you feel. The hardest part is just getting outside even for a second. Yes, we are out here....and know how heavy the weight is, on your shoulders. Why do caged birds sing? It is in their nature. Try to look up, not inwards.

When you find yourself cocooned in isolation and cannot find your way out of the darkness, remember that this is similar to the place where caterpillars go to grow their wings.
~Unknown