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12-19-2011, 04:58 PM | #1 | |||
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Elder
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And thinking this will be the last year. I don't mean I'm going to croak (though one never knows) or that I won't "do" Christmas. Just that, short of a miracle, next year I'll have to do things differently.
I'm already exhausted, don't have half the cleaning done, and don't start cooking until Saturday. I'll have to squeeze in the "decorating" somewhere! My husband helps, of course, but it's still way too much for me. Both of my kids and my granddaughter (all adults) have extenuating circumstances this year, and aren't able to be much help. I'm not going to make an issue of it. In fact, I probably won't even mention it until summer. Why poop the party? It won't kill me, and we'll have one last "traditional" Christmas before I announce we're going NONtraditional.
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* * * **My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. (Psalm 73:26) |
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12-19-2011, 05:48 PM | #2 | |||
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Elder
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It is tough to change...but I think you'll be able to enjoy the holiday and family better if you don't strive so much to make the holiday the way it "used to be"...
I have become so hyperaware of how aging takes so much away from what we experience as our lives...we take things so much for granted. My inlaws have become prisoners in their apartment, partially due to choice...makes me aware of how much being chronically ill has changed what I can do during these hectic holidays. I am a control freak, partially because I used to be so good at all of this type of stuff. I still cook really well, but the cleaning, baking, shopping, etc take so much energy from me that I can't enjoy our get togethers. So I am slowly but surely allowing others to take over. It makes me so sad...but I am trying my best to make lemonade out of lemons...trying not to concentrate on what I can't do, but what I CAN do...
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12-19-2011, 08:54 PM | #3 | |||
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In Remembrance
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Most of my hard core traditional family is in heaven now, driving Jesus nuts. My DD has certain traditions that she celebrates for her husband and kids. I tried to keep it going, but after DH died, 8 yrs ago, my matrioch roll changed.
Now we are a very spur of the moment, non traditional Family. We still have lots of fun, but at a non frenzied pace. If something doesnt get done, cleaned or cooked, we don't fly into a nervous breakdown over it. I actually find it much more relaxing and fun. It's a new tradition for a new age. I like it. No expectations, no disappointments, no fights no worries..
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~Love, Sally . "The best way out is always through". Robert Frost ~If The World Didn't Suck, We Would All Fall Off~ |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Blessings2You (12-20-2011), Debbie D (12-20-2011), kicker (12-22-2011), Kitty (12-26-2011), TwoKidsTwoCats (12-19-2011) |
12-19-2011, 11:36 PM | #4 | ||
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Senior Member
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Sally, that non-frenzied pace is the best way to fly!
Our Christmas traditions with family changed drastically when we moved 3000 miles away and could no longer drive home in a day. We realized it was ok not going "home"... mom and mom-in-law took a while adjusting to it though. Now that we are back closer to home...1/2 a days drive.. they still get it when we can't come because of work or my MS issues. It's all about just being together... not the stuff, the trimmings or things being perfect. We basically just have a big old family reunion and have fun!!
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Worrying is like a rocking chair it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere ~Van Wilder |
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12-20-2011, 06:03 AM | #5 | |||
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Legendary
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Quote:
Our day tends to be mostly unstructured and instead of a roast dinner, we are much more likely to sit down to seafood, or cold meats and salads while many will fire up their BBQ... either in their own back yard or else they head towards the beach for a picnic or BBQ there.
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Eastern Australian Daylight Savings Time and my temperature . |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Blessings2You (12-20-2011), SallyC (12-20-2011) |
12-20-2011, 08:30 AM | #6 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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As my sister whispered in my ear when my Dad died and Priest doing eulogy was working with what Evil Stepmother told him and there was no mention of us (his kids) or his 7 grandchildren. As she sensed my growing, useless anger she whispered "It's just one day". Really, it was. I have 46 years of memories. (my neighbor yelled at priest following ceremony, but it really wasn't his fault. It was Evil Stepmother. My revenge, didn't go to her funeral)(Course she was dead and didn't know. But.........)
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Kicker PPMS, DXed 2002 Queen of Maryland Wise Elder no matter what my count is. |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Blessings2You (12-20-2011), SallyC (12-20-2011) |
12-22-2011, 03:38 PM | #7 | |||
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In Remembrance
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I can't believe that Christmas is in 2.5 days and I have nothing wrapped and no food ready....and whats more, I don't care. I finally Gragiated from Home health care and am just exhausted....can't sleep enough.
I'm afraid Christmas will come and go, this year, with me just being a part of the wallpaper. I purchased all the Kiddles gifts and that's all they really care about. The Adult children get money (which I dont really have), and that's all they care about. My DD and I usually have a wrapping party, but I haven't heard anything and haven't asked. This is just not a good year for Christmas.
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~Love, Sally . "The best way out is always through". Robert Frost ~If The World Didn't Suck, We Would All Fall Off~ |
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12-22-2011, 04:12 PM | #8 | ||
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Elder
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[It is sure OK not to have a traditional Christmas. I don't eithor. We have several people bring a simple finger food dish. heck with the decorations and all the hub bub. It does all get to be too much. Since my family is not here, and it just a few close friends, it feels better not to be so stressed out about it. I made some cookies, that was about it. There does come a time, at least it did for me, when the stress got to be too much with all the running around for gifts, wrapping, big meals. Being disabled, kinda puts a damper on things for sure. So I just stopped doing it all. I am keeping the holiday holy in my heart. I have a small porcelain tree from my mother out of the 50's. I put a small hummel of the nativity under this tiny tree, and that is the extent of what I did. Stay close to your family and friends, that is the important part. I hope the holidays are not stressful for anyone, and that there is peace in each house. take care Blessings, I am thinking of you. ginnie
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Blessings2You (12-22-2011) |
12-22-2011, 07:18 PM | #9 | |||
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Elder
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For our family we have 2 on SSD, one with severe Addisons, 2 with bipolor, one with ODD, one that is just obnoxious, some others and then my two wonderful grandchildren. The older adults are the ones with SSD and Addisons. So we get together, some of it is good, some of it is drama. Hopefully by the next Christmas most of the previous year has been forgotten. We all love each other
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Blessings2You (12-22-2011), nemsmom (12-23-2011) |
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