I'm not having a very good time at the moment and I could do with a hug, if any one has one to spare.

My computer has been playing up once again, and I got some-one in today at $100 an hour and all he could tell me was that mine was going to cost more to fix than a new one would cost. He tells me that this one might go for another month or a week, but it might die tomorrow. It really is on it's last legs, so if I'm not around for a while, that maybe be the reason.

My DH goes into hospital in the morning for surgery, I woke up yesterday morning with the vomits then today I got the runs as well. Maybe I picked up gastro at our darling grand-son's birthday party on Sunday?

For those who know me well, you'll know that I only ever speak about my sister.....and I speak of her as the only family I have who matters to me. I actually had 2 brothers as well.....(one 4 years older, and one younger) but we have been alienated for some time.

Tonight I got a phone call to tell me that my older brother had died. My brother died 5 days ago, and I only found out today by accident. Apparently some-one saw the notice in the paper, and we (the other member's of the family) heard about it along the grapevine.

Alienated or not, he was still my brother and definitely not a nice way to find out your brother has died. How could his wife do that to the rest of his family? I can't even go to his funeral which is tomorrow, because I didn't hear in time to make any arrangements to get to the opposite end of the state, or to re-schedule DH's operation tomorrow for another date.

Maybe if his wife had told us that death was near as she knew it was, we might have been able to mend the rift, but it's too late now. So many things left unsaid that are all too late to say now. How does one cope with the guilt of this?

I'm so sorry Koala... I'd sit right down and write him a letter, pour out your feelings and tell him goodbye. Life is just to hard sometimes!

Anne

I'm so sorry for your loss. You have quite a full plate right now....please take care of you. Stress is not our friend as I'm sure you well know.

You and your DH are in my prayers. I hope his surgery goes well and he's on the mend soon. Hope you are feeling better, too. Gastro ailments are no fun.

Take all the time you need and remember that we all love and care about you.

Anne, I'm very sorry

Anne, I am so sorry for your loss. I agree with Alffe, sit down when you are ready and write him a letter. Tell him how you feel and get it out of your heart.

Remember we are here when you need a hug anytime! You certainly would do it for us!

Dear Anne, Im so sorry for your loss and for the way the news came
to you. Im keeping you and your family in my thoughts.

Oh my gosh Anne, I'm so sorry about your brother. That has to hurt you deeply. We have one of those detached brothers too. It's hard.

Don't worry about the computer, concentrate on your husband and yourself for now. I'll be praying for you and hoping you'll find some peace.

Anne, first I want to say I am so sorry about your brother and sorry his wife didn't contact you. I feel Jim's brother will be the same and we wont know until it's over. It's not your fault. The guilt is probably much of what I felt when my father died. I mourned for what could have been. It's sad for everyone involved. I am sure he is looking down on you and knows how much you did care and love him even though your were separated. Sometimes I get mad at my dad and I tell him even though he's gone. Talk to him, write it out, do what you need to do to get passed the hurt.

Tell hubby we wish him well during his surgery. Take care of you Anne. In the end, I am sure this is what your brother would want. I know it hurts to miss his funeral but he's not there anymore Anne, his soul has moved on. Say what you need to say now as if you were there. I too will pray you find peace in all this.

Ann,

I'm so sorry for your loss.

You're going through so much all at once! I'll keep you and your DH in my prayers.

I'm just so sorry about everything. Sometimes it just feels like it's all coming at you at once. I really have no words of advice especially about the circumstances of your brother's death. I'm really pretty speechless about that. It is just a sad situation.