With my husband he gets a little upset about something and can't let it go. He just keeps getting more upset and loses control of what he's doing or saying. Then he doesn't remember afterwards. Another example He'd decide he wanted to do something and can't seem to let that go either. he'd bug me till he got his way going so far as to bully me into doing what he wanted. never remembers afterwards tho. he's actually never had much problem admitting he's wrong(at least on things he remembers).

We're working on ways to deal with all of that. Some of the things we're doing is him coming to me when he starts getting upset or angry so i can help him calm down before it gets to the point that he's out of control.

If he has an issue with one of the kids he comes and tells me and i deal with it. So he doesn't go off on them. He's completely stopped having anything to do with disciplining the kids. Before he'd start talking to one of them about something like our youngest forgetting to take out the trash. next thing we'd know he'd go off on a 20 minute rant at her even yelling at her, then only remember being a bit stern about it, not losing it and yelling.

I've noticed a few tells that he's headed that direction, and I distract him and get him talking to me or focused on something else. things have been a LOT more relaxed around here. The kids actually like their dad now, they didn't want anything to do with him before. That was a big source of stress for him because he really didn't think he'd done anything to make them feel that way.

Since we've been talking about all this and figuring out ways to deal with things i've seen more of the great guy i married 19 yrs ago in the last month then i had in the last 15 yrs. there are still issues but we're both dealing with them better.

just having y'all on here to talk to is helping a LOT. thank you for taking the time.

Not to add stress to your family but he may do well with a companion / service dog. My daughter has a red healer who helps her cope with stress. A service dog can be trained to interrupt him when he starts to get tense.

Worth looking into. Google "psychiatric service dog."

This wouldn't add stress it would be a blessing, and it's something we'd already been talking about doing for me(I have ptsd, and a few other issues). Will be looking into doing this.