I just can't take it anymore. It is getting worse by the day. I have developed a new symptom even. At times I feel like there is acid on my leg in spots. And I haven't figured out why or what is causing it. And the pain...OMG! It is a constant 24/7 intense 10. I am just tired of crying all the time. I can't catch a breather. I feel so bad for my daughter because she will accidently hit me and I like almost screem and start crying and I try my hardest to reasure her that it is ok but I know that it hurts her.

I get my results back from my phsyc evaluation tomorrow then if that is ok (which I am sure it will be) then I get my trial SCS thursday. But I have so many fears and worries. What if something goes wrong? What if it makes me worse? What if it doesn't work? I can't keep living like this with no support. A person with this condition can't do it all on their own. And I don't know how to get my family and friends to understand that. That I need their love and help right now. They just don't get it. They just think I am weak. That I am too old to need help. It just breaks my heart that no matter what I would be there for them but when I need someone, no one will help me. I don't know what to do.

I am sorry, I just can't sleep and am in sooo much pain. I just needed to try to "talk" to someone. To let it out. I hope everyone is doing better than I am! And I hope you all have a wonderful week ahead!