Lottie you've hit the nail on the head for me...

I think this is a lovely idea....but (why are the buts always so big with CRPS? ) anything like this makes me grieve all over again for what I have lost. People say that when your life first changes from an illness/injury/death of a loved one, you have to grieve, come out the other side as best you can, take that deep breath and start again. Like coming up from the depths for air again.

I sometimes find that things happen to trigger those thoughts of loss again, and they make me sad. I can't help it. Like seeing a mum chasing her giggling child down the street....I immediately think, gosh they look happy, isn't that nice. And then I think, that was me. I used to do that. Now I can't. My youngest girl has missed out on such a lot this last few years, it's not fair on her. So I feel crap.

As I say, it's a lovely idea, and if you're strong enough to be able to just enjoy the memories without it stirring up too much by way of sadness and loss, then all power to you, go for it. I sometimes dream of times past when I was doing something active and enjoying it like the good ole days, but I wake with tears in my eyes, and that crushing sense of loss again as the pain and stiffness of morning stamp on it all with their heartless reality.

I must admit I don't consciously go back like that to better days very often. I try to live in the now, not think too much about the future, and make the best of what I have today. Otherwise I just feel too darned sorry for myself and end up wasting the day dwelling on things I wish I could do...but that's just me Maybe I'm just not quite there yet lol.

I'll give it a go though. I'm always up for a new plan and a new way of looking at this crappy cripsy crud!

Thanks for the imagery and posts, lovely stuff. I know what I'll pick to dream through....

Bram