Originally Posted by pzimmy55

Thank you for the concern and greetings everyone

Sam,
When I say a better day, I don't meant that the fog went away. I mean that I was able to recognize and stop my anxiety with nothing but the power of my thoughts. I felt slightly more alive and even enjoyed myself a bit, in the fog. I wasn't able to do this today, sometimes it's harder to control my thoughts in my weakened mental state. I still consider it a success.

I know that it is incredibly hard to stay positive, when day after day it's the same. I've never been a particularly positive person myself. But I do remember how happy I used to be. The feelings may allude me, but the memories are there. And that is something worth fighting for.

I believe that you are on the right track with therapy. I believe that controlling your anxiety is step number one.

Increased depression and anxiety is a common side effect of brain injuries. And those with preexisting conditions (i.e. depersonalization) usually have those conditions intensified severely after the brain injuries. Whether or not you are still dealing with your injury, I believe that injury may have caused your condition.

Us intellectual folk usually associate ourselves with our intelligence, it's how we've always known ourselves to be. The simple post-concussion "daze" could be just that to most people, but to us, I feel as if it is something that we dwell on, and try to figure out, or to beat in some way. We are concerned about the compromised state of our intelligence, either consciously or subconsciously, and our anxious mind works effortlessly to fix something that, if we just give time, will fix itself. You brain then shuts off your emotional responses to things in order to "safeguard" your body, wreaking havoc on your mind.

Like I said before, I don't believe that the improvements will happen overnight, nor will they probably be very noticeable. That's why we need to concentrate on what we have the power to control, and nothing else. We can't get rid of the fog, but we sure can try our damndest to chip away at it one sliver at a time. One day it's not going to be able to withstand it any longer.

I wish you all the best kid, I really do. Make sure to continue to post updates. If I beat this demon before you, I promise I'll help you beat it too.

All I know is that it will not defeat me. I am the captain of my fate.

Good luck kid.

-Peter

Originally Posted by OhKay

Is there a possibility you could have been suffering from food poisoning, Sam? The symptoms fit.

I think what Peter's trying to say that he's been able to change his view of his life and how he responds to his situation by managing his anxiety…

I have medical and psych problems. Life can be a challenge, and I struggle with anxiety despite the meds I take. But at periods I'm successful in managing my anxiety in different ways without having to reach for my klonopin, or only having to use it sparingly. Most of my success comes when I focus on immediate challenges, rather than allowing myself to get overwhelmed by worrying about too many things at once, or viewing my situation as a whole.

Whether you end up needing meds, or you can learn how to manage your anxiety through the techniques you learn in therapy alone, you will get there. Your therapist has given you an excellent prognosis on the whole. I understand you are impatient because but you are suffering, but please try to hang in there. It will take time.
How much time it takes to see results from therapy varies among individuals…

"It's been almost 2 years, and I find it hard to believe my brain is still healing from when I hit my head playing football in October of 2014."

How long it takes for the brain to repair itself from injury varies among individuals as well. It's uncommon for symptoms of PCS to persist for that long, but it's a possibility.

I'm sorry If you already answered this and I missed it, but did you have any symptoms of depression or anxiety prior to your head injury, even if they were mild?

Originally Posted by bizi

wow, that sounds really scarey.
I am so sorry that happened to you.
What did your sister the nurse think?
bizi

Originally Posted by SamG11

I'm trying to wait but its just so hard. Everything is going downhill..



And prior to the concussion yes I did have depression and anxiety, they were very mild. I have always been extremely sensitive and would get nervous over little things a whole bunch, and tend to think and replay a situation over and over again. It's funny, because just last night I was thinking about all the years before the concussion if there was something I missed, and all my memories pf my childhood were ironically bad ones.



I went through every year of school starting from 7th (the year before my concussion) to way back untill my earliest memory of childhood, and the first memories that came back to my head were all small but yet bad memories. For example, 7th passing out at soccer game and rushed to hospital, 6th grade first memory was being yelled at in front of everyone by my teacher in the hall for something I did not do, 5th grade being made fun of, 4th grade teacher said I was going to fail at life, 3rd grade being made fun of, etc.



Overall, I thought I had a fantastic happy childhood. But it seems like my brain has hold on to the vivid bad memories and events and kept on to them ever since, and has forgotten about all the good and happy memories.

Originally Posted by OhKay

Reliving events repeatedly is a symptom of anxiety. I know it feels terrible. I do it to myself often.

I have many happy childhood memories, but I tend to remember the bad (and very bad) ones much more vividly when I allow myself to. These unhappy things have left a larger impression on me because they've traumatized me…
I think it's a good idea for you to discuss the vivid memories you have and the ones you are reliving with your therapist. They have obviously have made an impression on you for a reason.

Your anxiety and depression may have gotten worse on their own, but the PCS may have helped them along the way. What's important is that you're getting help now.

BTW...
How are things at school?
How are you occupying your free time right now?
I know that you were making positive changes to your diet, how is that going?