Ok guys, here I go again... Rambling again I guess....

But, there is something that it is relly bothering me these days... Fear... Since the first moment I wake up, to the last minute of the day Im awake, I have fear... Fear thinking about my future... Not my professional future, not my economical future... no, it is about my health future....

I fear I can loose my vision... I fear I can loose my hair... I dont know... I know it is bad to "attract" bad things, that is precisly why I want to stop thinking negative things, but I just cant !!!!!!!!!!

Has this happened to you ?? What do you do to throw negative thoughts away !?

Im feeling desperate....

Thanks.

Oh boy! Talk to a counselor. This reminds me of my dad who spent his entire life obsessing about his health and fear of death to the point it interferred with his life, mom's, and my sister and mine. (And still does.)

Maybe an anti-anxiety medication and therapy? Fear is no fun to deal with sweetness.

xanax is GREAT for that - see if your doctor will prescribe some. It is an anti-anxiety drug and it really works!

I know what your talking about. Fear leading to dread. They are phobias. I've been battling these phobias since I was a teenager. There is evidence that I had OCD also when I was under ten years old. With my phobia's, I feel like something bad is going to happen deep down. I have these suicide thoughts bothering me when I think about these things.

Xanax is good for the short term treatment of phobias. Usually the things that you dread don't ever happen. Fear has torment. The fear,torment problem is very hard to live with. I sympathize with you.

My phobia problem started suddenly from a tramatic experience when I was a teenager. At times I've had many phobias tormenting me at one time. I didn't get help until several years later. I know how real these problems are,and all of the misunderstandings that people have about this. BF

Thank you a lot dear friends !

I will definetely ask my doc about Xanax...

I hate this feeling !!!! You know, I always thought that depression, phobias, all that stuff was felt but without realizing it.... But, me, myself, feel tired of my fear, tired of being depressed.... I think there are people who feel this stuff and dont evn realize... but in my case, I realize it ! And I dont want to feel this... oh boy...

Rambling as usually....

Thanks.

When you start thinking about a frightening thought,try to do this. Try to what I call,change the channel so to speak,and think of something else,and don't think of the other thing for 15 minutes. That other thought should loose it's intensity.

I went to the show at the Fair when I was growing up. They showed people with all kinds of unusual physical conditions. When I got home I looked at myself to make sure that I wasn't getting some of those same things for months. That show scared me,and I was afraid that I could get problems like those people had. I got over that after awhile.

Talk to a counsellor about these fears. You can get help. It's good to get help when you are young. Doctors know more about phobias then they use to,much more.

Parents may never understand. My dad tried to understand,and sister,but they never could really understand. My mother didn't understand. At one time I was making bad grades because my reading got distracted,because of the OCD. People don't seem to understand this type of thing either. I don't understand it myself,and I surely didn't pick this thing to plague my thoughts. That's where we go back to inheritance. We inherite the good traits,and the bad traits form the family tree. We can make the right choices on how to deal with these challenges.

This problem may also be biochemical,and you may need medication. The trait is in my family tree on my mothers side. I see it clearly now,but didn't see it when I was a teenager.

I fealt bad about myself,as if it where me,and that it was my fault. No. I inherited the trait,and I struggle with it.

I believe that I saw a post in the Sanctuary that you wrote. Please read Isaiah 40 on up to the end of Isaiah. You will find a lot of comfort verses in those chapters. BF

Thank you dear BF
I really, really appreciate your message. I will follow all the advices you gave me. Thank you a lot.
It mean a lot.

Anytime. I know how hard this problem is,and some people can't just shake phobias off. It's alot deeper then people know,and they cannot possibly understand if they do not,or have not struggled with phobias. People mean well,but they don't understand.

There is hope. Day by day,the scientists are making progress. You are young,and there's help for you,and you may get over it. Give yourself some time,and don't let people put guilt trips on you who don't understand.

Know that you are a precious person,of great value,created,and blessed. BF

Yes ((Blue)) I think you should talk to a professional about it.

I spent a lot of time talking about my dad with my therapist. Dad is just a sweetheart, but I'm tellin ya, it's been difficult dealing with his severe anxiety all my life.

My therapist said that without meeting him in person, just from what I told her she said he had a severe case of OCD and anxiety. Funny thing is, he's not a depressed person.

Here's a for-instance. Wherever he walks, he always knocks lightly on the walls and doorways he passes through. 3 times each time. When he was a little boy, his sister (who was all about health problems and dying) told my dad that he had to knock on things 3 times or he would die.

So, to this day, he does that.

When I was a little girl, there were times I'd come home from school and find my younger sister hiding outside crying, scared to death. Because my dad would be inside and the first thing he'd say to me is "Call your mother, I think I'm dying." He would wake me up in the middle of the night to sit with him when he was having a panic attack because my mother would get mad if he woke her up.

He used to call my mom and she would have to rush to his office to sit with him because of his attacks. We rarely travelled, but when we did, we always had to pull over to the side of the road because he would invariable have a panic attack and need to get out of the car because he thought he was having a heart attack and dying.

He still can't drive anywhere alone, serious, not anywhere.

These kinds of stories are plentiful, but you get the idea. He really has spent his entire life being afraid that each moment was his last. He's been to doctors more than anyone I've ever known.

Sigh. So please, do talk to someone about the obsessive thoughts so that you can get some help with it before you end up with a life of worry. Life is just too short. And I know it's hard! It's very frightening! But there is help sweetie, there is. I'm so sorry you're going through it.

I've had a few panic attacks and they just are no fun!

And we love you.

Aw... BF !!! Thank you. You are an absolute sweetheart ! That last paragraph brought tears to my eyes.... Thank you for everything.

Doody !!!! Thanks !!!
Yeah... Panic attacks are not fun You know, specially when Im consious Im having one !!! Is your dad consious he is obssesed ?? I mean, I think some people dont even realize, and I have always wondered if they live happier than me because they do and live the way they think it is or has to be... but me, I do realize Im "crazy" and obssesed ya know...
Also, I mean, if Im alone in my room, I just close the door and sleep or cry until the attack is over BUT, what if it happen at school ? the subway I take everyday... ? I have to control myself and feel my fears way deep inside me, which also I think is pathetic... sometimes I guess is just better to... explode !!! Aw....

I love you too Doody !