Hi Sparky, I've been here intermittently, and I don't remember you, but glad to see you. I too have bad memories, some of them of work, but more of them related to family and university years. I pray God often to "heal my memories". Some days, they go away. Some days they come back suddenly; I'll remember a situation and see it clearly in my mind, and I may start to cry. And so much of these situations were directly related to my physical limitations--probably as in your case? (I don't know what your job was). Because I looked normal, apart from a slightly meandering walk, sympathy was not often forthcoming. I myself did not know what was wrong, and tended to believe reports that I needed mental readjustment. I tried hard to do that mental readjustment, and most of the trying was wasted, but I must say I did learn some things about myself and life through the "wasted" effort.
Hoping the bad memories go away soon and stay away. Yes you are grieving a big loss.
I hope BF is helpful in these times. My husband was so helpful when I was down, just by being there and on my side.

I know exactly how you feel....I have my moments where I say, chuck it all, there are also moments I weep for the reasons why, and think I might have done something wrong to deserve this.

I was here a long time ago, but I doubt I am remembered. Just wanted to chime in and say you are loved....(I know you you know this, coming from me, but it bears saying again)

Hey Sparky! Remember when you met me and my DH for that dinner in Chicago? Somebody else was there but I'm drawing a blank on that. Of course you are welcome here! I still go there once in awhile for their arcade but rarely anymore. I'm sorry they treated you unfairly. You did a lot of work for maintaining that website.

Misshayleesmom and Mariel, thank you for your kind words! I'm afraid my BF has the "get over it" attitude.

Wiz, look above your post! That was Beckyr you met! Remember that huge spotted eel?! I might even have those pics somewhere.

And Becky, my dear friend of 10 years...!

I think I left the area just after the mass exodus about moderating posts. Many folks were fired up and didnt want to have to wait for someone to read, approve of, then finally post their posting. It only took a few minutes, but it felt like censorship and it upset many. It was stated very clearly to me that its not what the site wanted, but was a demand of the MS society that it be done that way. I contacted the MS society and on several levels was told NO WAY was that their rule. The individual sites that represent them can set their own rules. That was just ONE of the many layers of half truths, and untrue things I found going on there.

I adored some of the people there. it was a wrench to let go and walk out that door. I was trying to tell some that I too have MS and its hard for me to sit at my computer for 6 hours to moderate postings. If I can sit for 6 hours, why wouldnt I get a job? it was a hard thing for me in the early days, but I was so information hungry. I read everything I could get my hands on. I worked hard to educate myself about this disease. From what the experts said to what the patients with the disease said.

I have found this place to be more inclusive, and more compassionate and anyone from any forum can jump in anytime and just hug you, or wipe your tears, or calm your fears, or share their experiences, or simply say how happy they are to see you. Even posts such as "where are you?!" or "what have you wiggled in public today?" Funny things to make us laugh and draw us together. There are no lines drawn in the sand to say "you cant speak directly to another patient, you must say it thru me." (that was another site). I tried on many MS websites for size, and this one suits me just fine.

After leaving my post, I was shell shocked, over worked, over tired, overwhelmed and it was an adjustment to not sit at the computer for hours and hours and hours. I was just able to concentrate on MY needs, and being helpful and friendly without the iron glove on. I hope you find the peace, and the rest that I have found in this place. it truly has been a healing well for me to sit and think, or drink, or whine, or cry on MY schedule. its come to be a home for me. I hope it can be the same for you.

Welcome to NeuroTalk, Sparky! We welcome everyone here and hope you continue to come to this website and share your experience with us. We're a really nice group.

Sparky, your plight brings back a sad memory for me, of a similar situation I was in with another Company. I was not let go completely, but was asked to step down and take a demotion. I left, hurt, never to return.

So I know what betrayal and petty jealousies can do to a person and a Company.

Please feel better and thanks for joining our happy sick little group.

Hi Sparky! Welcome to NT!

I remember you. I'm so sorry about how you were treated. Although, when many of us left the company, we left for a different reason. I'm glad you found us over here and look forward to reading your posts and input.

Sparky,
I remember you also...been awhile!!

This place is so great for us...info, hugs, laughs, tears, whine, cheese...the whole works. Occasionally we get a tiny little slap on the wrist when we get too political, but it's to keep us all close knit, IMHO.
That other world I used to inhabit? I got tired of the lock-step attitude...I began to worry about my posts all the time. And being pre-approved before being posted got under my skin big time.

Keep us up to date on how you're doing...

As has been mentioned in the past perhaps it is prudent to remain focused on this community so we can preserve our long standing atmosphere of friendly support and respect for diversity.