[LadyMoreta]

This is hard to write. About 15 yrs ago my husband went from being a great guy to being abusive. he'd get mad about some tiny thing and cuss me out, then if i said anything about it he'd say i was nuts(lots of other stuff too). He got aggressive enough that i was afraid he'd hit me or the kids, So in September I kicked him out. Up to that point any time i tried to talk to him about it he blew it off as me making stuff up cause i was mad at him.

Got to talking to him afterwards and found out he had no idea he had done any of that stuff, didn't remember it(no wonder he thought i was making it up). I told him to come home on the condition that we get him to a doctor and find out what's going on his health is more important then my comfort level. While we were talking he started pointing out things that were out of character for him. Like snapping at his mom for no reason, I've been with him 22 years and NEVER heard him raise his voice to her not even when she deserved it. He agreed we need to find out what's going on, and is back at home.

over the last 15 yrs, He'd say stuff or get mad and yell at one of us about something and not remember it at all later.

Say one of us said or did something we didn't then not remember it later.

he'd do odd things that didn't make any sense at all. Like asking our oldest daughter if she wanted to play on his computer, then 5-10 minutes later got mad and yelled at her that it's his comp and he should be able to use it any time he wants, and she needs to quit being selfish. He doesn't remember doing that, and it doesn't even make sense to him why he'd do that.

He gets easily confused, gets upset and cannot calm himself down, needs help with things he used to be able to do with no trouble. Up until a couple years ago he was the go to guy for anyone in the family that had computer problems now he calls me so he can tell me what's going on with the computer so I can tell him what's wrong with it and how to fix it.

About 4 yrs ago his got bit by a brown recluse and had a hole in his foot. Got it treated and it didn't heal, he went to the wound center and it took almost 4 yrs to get it to heal up. it also took them over 3 yrs to figure it wouldn't heal because he had a blown vein in his leg and get that fixed.
He has had nearly constant tremors for the last 5 years. Not bad enough to be visible most of the time, but was sometimes. Those mostly stopped about 4 months ago. His entire body shakes sometimes still tho. He also has jaw tremors sometimes right after he wakes up(his jaw will jerk several times) he's unaware of it when it happens. A few times his eyes have rolled back when that happened.

within the last three months. He has had a couple episodes that start off kind of like an anxiety attack and end up looking like a grand mal seizure, he's completely nonresponsive during and for a few minutes afterwards. both episodes were pretty much exactly the same. He doesn't remember anything about these except being a little upset about something tho he doesn't know what.

He has had one episode where insisted on cooking supper when he could hardly stand up, afterwards he said he felt like he was drunk, knew what was going on just didn't have any control over it. this one he remembers.

The other night we were watching tv. I looked over at him and he was stareing at the floor. Eyes open not even blinking. after about a minute he started blinking again, i asked him why he was looking at the floor and he had no idea. Said he was watching the show and the next thing he knew i was asking him about stareing at the floor. His guess was that he fell asleep.....

Hubby is 39. He had an incident when he was working about 15 yrs ago where he broke his nose. at the time he told me he dropped a pallet on his nose. didn't find out till he told a friend about it at the beginning of the month that there was a lot more to it. he actually dropped the pallet on the back of his head and it drove his face into a concrete dock. he was pretty much out on his feet for a while. he wasn't checked for anything they had him taken to the hospital stitched up and sent home. Dunno if that's what started all this but it's a place to start.

He had had several concussions before that weren't anywhere near that bad. it was after the incident at work that his personality started changeing, it just went downhill from there.

He's had an EEG and a MRI that both came back normal. One visit to a neurologist, who wants a ton of blood work done. he did say that some of the stuff going on could be seizures. hopefully we'll get some answers.

i'm posting this here and the general neurology forum, maybe someone will have some ideas what else might be going on.

[Living_Dazed]

Read, read, read. Go to the threads above and read them. We were lost when we first started this. Still a maze, but people here are helpful and a bright spot in the dark.

Peace and healing, Jace

[hopefulmom]

Another idea might be this:http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/sh...33#post1011133

NED-neuroendocine dysfunction

[LadyMoreta]

Thank you both. I'm reading all that it's gonna take some time to get through it all.

[Mark in Idaho]

LadyM,

Did anything happen to your husband 15 years ago ? A car accident, surgery, head trauma, chemical exposure, etc ?

The personality change you mention is symptomatic of a brain injury/trauma.

It does sound like a seizure disorder may be the problem. An EEG does not rule out a seizure. Maybe a NeuroPsych Assessment or at least a consult with a neuro Psychologist will be helpful.

My best to you.

[ginnie]

You have been through a lot with your husband. It seems that you need more help, and maybe another opinion on how best to proceed. If he would agree to see another doctor, keep a record of all that occurs, like a journal, including all these symptoms. I agree with the other post too, read like crazy. There are many folks here to help you . TBI is a huge forum and I hope you get many responses. ginnie

[LadyMoreta]

Originally Posted by Mark in Idaho

LadyM,

Did anything happen to your husband 15 years ago ? A car accident, surgery, head trauma, chemical exposure, etc ?

The personality change you mention is symptomatic of a brain injury/trauma.

It does sound like a seizure disorder may be the problem. An EEG does not rule out a seizure. Maybe a NeuroPsych Assessment or at least a consult with a neuro Psychologist will be helpful.

My best to you.

Thank you Mark.

He was working moving pallets, carrying two over his head. When he went to throw them up on the loading dock the bottom one went the top one didn't. Came down on the back of his head and drove his face into the loading dock. Broke (and cut)his nose pretty bad, he was coughed up blood, and was really out of it for a while(don't know how long, he doesn't either). the company he worked for sent him to the hospital but all that got done was they stitched his nose up. I didn't know the whole story till recently. He told me at the time he'd just smacked himself in the nose with the pallet. That on top of who knows how many concussions from fights and JROTC Ranger camp stuff(none of them have ever been treated).

The neuro he's going to now is a neuro Psychologist.

Originally Posted by ginnie

You have been through a lot with your husband. It seems that you need more help, and maybe another opinion on how best to proceed. If he would agree to see another doctor, keep a record of all that occurs, like a journal, including all these symptoms. I agree with the other post too, read like crazy. There are many folks here to help you . TBI is a huge forum and I hope you get many responses. ginnie

Were still on the first opinion. Just finally got him to admit(took me kicking him out of the house) somethings wrong and go to the doctor last month. We don't have much choice about which doc he sees state medical cards don't really cover much or give us many options. He hasn't been able to work for a long time and I'm on SSI. The doc we saw at the clinic seems to have given him a referral to a decent neuro. We've only seen him once but he seems to know what he's talking about so far. I've written down a list of everything i can think of to take to the next appointment on Nov 7th.

I've been reading(did have to take a break from that to watch "The Walking Dead" with my daughter tho. and to answer on here.

Thank you Ginnie.

[St George 2013]

Hey LadyM.....I'm Debi from Georgia and your post just touched me. I hope your husband finds the help he needs and your family can heal.

On a lighter note......We also love The Walking Dead. I actually live quite close to where they film and my next door neighbor works for the company that does the set building....like the prison...all the fencing, etc. Pretty cool talking to him. Sometimes he'll bring home a zombie finger or hand to show the grandkids.

Take care of yourself and keep us posted.
Debi

[LadyMoreta]

Originally Posted by St George 2013

Hey LadyM.....I'm Debi from Georgia and your post just touched me. I hope your husband finds the help he needs and your family can heal.

On a lighter note......We also love The Walking Dead. I actually live quite close to where they film and my next door neighbor works for the company that does the set building....like the prison...all the fencing, etc. Pretty cool talking to him. Sometimes he'll bring home a zombie finger or hand to show the grandkids.

Take care of yourself and keep us posted.
Debi

Thank you, we're working on it. things we're pretty bad for a long time, kids wanted him gone, quite frankly all three of us were afraid of him. But once we got talking and kinda figured out what was going on the kids decided he needed to come home(so he could go to the doc and get help, he would have lost his med card living with his mom but not if he came home) as fast as i did. things have been a lot better since he's been home. we're figuring out ways to deal with the various issues here. now that we have more pieces of the puzzle (and i don't think he's just being a jerk and he knows i'm not making all of it up) it's been quite a bit less stressful which seems to have helped a bit. He's still had a few episodes(seizures, maybe) but nothing like it was.

My oldest daughter and i just started watching "The Walking Dead" and both of us LOVE it, we've managed to watch almost the entire first three seasons in less then a week. pretty cool living close to that.

we're doing the best we can, Will keep y'all updated on things.

[Mark in Idaho]

LadyM,

It sounds like a classic case of personality change due to brain injury. I suffered a bad concussion at 10 years old. My mother told my wife a few years ago that after that concussion, I was not her sweet little boy any more.

As I look back at my life, I can see how I have struggled and caused struggles and pain for my family.

It is possible for him to tolerate this better. If a professional can help him fully understand the organic nature of this, he can choose to take steps to work against his own physiology. I had to realize that my intense feeling that I deserved to be able to respond the way I was responding was wrong. I was not entitled to be angry or loud. It was my brain misbehaving.

I actually carry a piece of paper in my wallet that says I have a tendency to get loud when confronted. I use it to get assistance at airports and other intense situations.

Another symptom of an injury like he suffered is called rigidity of thought. It is like stubbornness but is more physiological than behavioral. He may lock onto a small detail with an obsessive style. He may lock onto a sense that he is right and nobody is going to change that fact.

If he can get the help to understand his condition, he can then learn to defer to you or others that understand his condition when he messes up. My wife will gently touch my arm or hand to pull my focus back to something more acceptable. She can tell when I am getting close to crossing the line.

If you would like, send me a Private Message or email and I can put you in touch with her.