I feel so lonely. Even thogh my husband support me a lot, I feel that I want to cry and yell and speak with someone, but I don't want to bather anyone. With my friends I don't speak about my health, no one wants to hear problems or sorrow. So I keep smiling, but Inside I want to cry. and I need to take it out - all this sorrow that I have.
I don't know if I exprese myself right, but I know that you can give me hints to how to think positivly about life and how to leave with happiness, even with the pains ...
Need your help!!!!!

Rina,
The problem you have is probably depression. Chronic pain and bad health creates depression. Have you spoken with your doctor about this? There may be medication he can give you to help you thru this.

You are grieveing for the lost you. The one who was healthy. It's hard, but we all go thru this to a certain extent. My days are full right now, but the pain is there covering everything else. Yesterday was my birthday and a friend came by and took me to lunch and to a bead shop to buy jewelry makings. I went, I ate and I did a small amt. of shopping. But over it all was pain. Pain that was so miserable that I went to a chair in the bead shop to sit down several times. So I understand what you are talking about. People that know me say they can see it in my eyes.

You are very lucky to have a husband that understands. Does your family understand also? Having family around you that understands makes it easier. Has the neuropathy limited your ability to get out of the house?
If it has, then you need to find more ways to get out of the house.

But most of all, I suggest talking to your doctor about this. Perhaps if he doesn't think medication is correct, he'll refer you to someone who can talk to you.
We care and do deeply understand.
Billye

Hi Rina, I would take Silverlady's advise and talk with your doctor. Even just a mild antidepressant can work wonders.

Do you walk? Even though my pain and burning and pins and needles are there 24/7, some days worse than others (just in my feet), I have found that walking helps me work through the pain and lifts my spirits. If I can't walk outside, I go to a local mall. I do this most every day at least a mile to 1 1/2 miles. I am also on Lyrica and Tramadol which works for me.

The people on this board are very understanding and very helpful. Even though I don't post a lot, I read every post every day and I learn so much from everyone.

There are many meds for PN. some are anti-seizure,
some are analgesics, and some are anti-depressants- like Cymbalta.
It might be that if you can change your PN med, you also can
gain the benefit of the anti-depressant type.
This could be of help to you.
But you've gotta talk to your doc about it. ....Soon !

I agree about the fact that you are probably depressed, and need to see a doctor about this. The other thing that will help your depression is better pain control. What are you using for pain? You may need to increase a medication or find a more effective one.

ecuse me if i offended anyone. But darn it's 107 here it's hot!!!!!
But i would take that 107 heat without air conditionig which is nuts,
because the heat would kill me in the condition,i'm in. I don't want to died
i want the heat to go away.i was in Wall-Mart way after my bed time,
(which means very late) i was there because i forgot something i
needed. I said to Bob my gosh listen to all those crying children,they
should have be home in bed,what the heck are there parents thinking.

He gave me you have lost your marbles look again,which means look
around goof ball. I was in my wheelchair again,supose to be at home
with my legs up at all times,and i'm making a fuss about little ones,
who's parents have them there,because it's cool and ther parents have
no air.. Now it's been a little hard on us with that air bill,but we have air.
Earlier that day the wound and burn Dr. said your staying in aren't you,
well i yelled at him,do you think i'm stupid to,i mean after all you get
so upset because we ask about what is causing our pain,,and your
crabby because you hear it just to much. haven't you. Well i would not
recommend you talk to your Dr. that way..It got quiet and he smiled
and said Sue if your hurting speak up but not so loud.

Honey your words ,we have said them,i wish i could stop and i will but
I hope you will be able to soon,because it's awfull. It's not always this
hot,i'm not always in this much pain..Do you have a Dr. who can help you,
there all different, at what they do or can do for pain..We have depression
but i know i wouldn't without the pain,and you wouldn't either.Friends,
family husbands,you know they get tired but maybe it's your ture to
complain,not drive crazy ut complain. Our maybe you can come to the
Dr. with me old buddy and help me tell the Dr. how much i have changed,
how much i hurt. I'm sure you have helped so many,it's your turn. I know
now that my children helped so much before they moved away,and i'm
not my sweet self. You hurt,i hope you can get something for your pain.

And you can vent,and hollow at us ,caus it's not to lould in Cspace.
And your weclome to e-mail me cause i'm staying home it's hot and
West Nile is all around us... Sue

Lonely... Boy do I understand. The lonlieness in my case stemmed from being the only person I knew who has an invisible debilating chronicly painful illness, and not having the medical community be able to offer a cure.

Not knowing what the next day may bring...

So many uncertainties,and nobody to share the burden with you. I think many of us here in this community have felt or feel as you do now.

In my case, I was very unwell,and my autonomic system was all over the place too. I'd like you to know that though I am not cured, I have recovered a great deal from my early days, and the same may happen to you.

Follow the advice in the stickies,and look after yourself. Allow yourself time to heal.

It takes a long time to heal from nerve damage and the healing can be just as painful as the injury.

You will find alot of support and knowledge on this board, and hopefully this will be a place to share the burden and not feel so lonely.

But never loose faith,as it's a gift that only you can give yourself. If you have one person in your family who supports you,don't shut them out. If you have one person to lean on your very lucky.

Sadly enough I have not shared the sorrow and tears with my husband,and have gone the last 2 and a half years of being ill in silence. Due to PN being so hard to diagnose and confirm, after 2 top neurologists could not find anything wrong with me, my husband convinced himself that it was all in my head. I have imagined this illness. That was over 2 years ago, and I have never discussed it with him since. It does get very lonely, I know. But you nor I are alone. If you made it this far, you are definately not alone anymore.

Hi rina, this is a really rotten disease and it affects so many world wide, trouble is, know one else can see why your hurting, the skin looks perfect on the outside and that's why people can't understand it.
Worst thing to do is to bottle everything up, emotional factors are known to aggravate the condition and give you more unwanted pain, i would tell my friends and if they didn't want to hear about it, well, would they be true friends ? they may want to try to help you and when your with them and you don't feel that great, at least they will know why.
Your fortunate to have a understanding husband and i agree with all the previous posters, tell your doctor how you feel, there is a ton of different meds out there that may help you more than whatever your taking now, sometimes it takes a little while before you get the right mixture of meds that suit you.
You are not alone, anytime you feel like you want to talk to people that do understand, just write a post in here, there are some very kind and sincere people here that will answer you.
I hope you feel better soon,
Brian

Hi Rina: I do not have PN so I cannot imagine the physical pain you go thru. I am so sorry that you are suffering. You pulled my heart out when I read your post. Please Rina..vent thru NeuroTalk. So many people are here for you! We are all here to suport each other and to help see each other thru our rough times. If you can just keep posting! I find that when I am sad..I post it..the members here carry me thru...with a little help from above! Stress really gets me...my diabetes gets much worse and I feel so sick when my sugars are not in control....then I feel sad. We are all so glad that you are here and we want to help. Sending you lots of hugs!! Take care and keep posting!!!! Dorrie

I just want to second all that others have written in this thread.

I went through sadness and depression too, especially mourning the loss of being able to backpack or jog (or even walk very well), and being alone with an invisible painful illness. My doctors at the time thought there was nothing wrong with my pink warm feet with a strong pulse. None even gave a neurological screening. They dismissed the extreme burning, stabbing, throbbing pain as "anxiety". Two suggested tranquilizers or psychotherapy. Besides being depressed, I wanted to throttle those three miserable excuses for physicians.

Now, 14 years later, I love and enjoy life, even the painful days and painful moments, and even through pneumonia and a cancer scare last year. Hang in there and learn what you can. At least for me, knowledge empowered me to take charge of my own health, using physicians as they serve my needs.That feeling of being in control, and accepting my illness made all the difference. I agree you're lucky to have a loving supportive spouse, as I do.

Do you have cats or dogs? Last year I had pneumonia, and a cancer cell showed up in a lung biopsy. During the pneumonia my two wonderful cats were always hanging out with me as I slept all day, or hobbled around. They demanded nothing, just to be with me in companionship as I was slowly (I thought) dying. If you're not allergic, a good cat is a treasure and a dear companion...not a pet. You can't dominate a cat, and they don't try to dominate you. But if you treat them right, they adore you. Ill or healthy, young or old, beautiful or ugly, man or woman makes no difference to them. They respond to what's in your heart and who you are with them.

Hang in there. Learn about your illness and how to powerfully cope, act on what you learn and things will be much better. That's a promise. A good place to learn is our "Stickies" section. Skim or read through the threads. The topic often changes and just what you need might be well down the thread that started out about something with little application to you.