Originally Posted by Littlepaw

Hey Sam! I was just thinking about you. That is great news you have an appointment with a therapist coming soon. It sounds like she has great experience. I hope it is a good fit. Keep in mind it may feel a little awkward at first and this is normal. Or it may feel very comfortable. Just stay open to the experience and know that everyone is wishing you the best in your recovery.

On being in a funk. You are off routine with the holiday break and while not having the stress of classes can be nice it can also leave one feeling at loose ends. I personally don't think playing video games all day or staying in bed are good for you. I'd feel trapped if I did that too. Since you stated you don't feel good out of the house OR in the house then I would lean towards getting out of the house for different activities. When people are struggling with depression it is common for them to feel like they can't engage in activities but it is important to do so anyway.

Go out for walk, shoot some hoops, watch a funny movie or read a gripping book. Different stimuli will help you heal and feel more normal even if it is stretch to want to do them.

Did you see the new Star Wars movie yet? I was pleasantly surprised. They did a really nice job. My whole family loved it. If you haven't gone yet then do, it will be enjoyable and a good shared memory with your family. Daddy's Home looks funny too.

You matter! I promise. Keep it light and hang in there. Your appointment will be here soon.

Originally Posted by Littlepaw

Thanks Sam, (Thanks Lara and Dave, too)

I am happy to be of help.

Your pediatrician may have a recommendation on a therapist or they may not. Probably the first step is a follow up appointment to apprise them of your testing results and your desire to move forward with treatment. You can ask then if they know anyone. If they recommend medication as well, I would be sure this is something they are really comfortable with skillwise. Prescribing psychiatric meds is something of an art and is sometimes best left to specialists instead of general practitioners. Side effect profiles and withdrawal syndromes are sometimes different for your age. Personally, I would lean towards trying therapy alone for a while unless suicidal thoughts are overwhelming. Of course we all want you to be safe. If you are stuck in distress sometimes meds are helpful in enabling the therapy to do its work. You, your parents and doctor can look at all your options and decide what is best for YOU.

Choose a therapist with experience working with adolescents who is able to establish a rapport with people your age. Rapport is very important and you will progress faster with someone you feel "gets" you. Experience with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a plus but Several modalities may be helpful for you. Having a therapist with a decent toolbox and your motivation to get better is going make a difference.

I worked with a therapist after my nerve injury and found her here...
https://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/

I went from her treatment interests and specialties, we emailed a little and I went for an initial appointment and it was a good fit. Sometimes your insurance company will have a list if you don't find anyone. My therapist was an LCSW but someone with credentials of LPC, LCSW or LMFT will have the training and certification to work with you.

I am so glad to see your motivation and desire for help. This is an excellent starting point. People have an amazing capacity to change. Their motivation level is many times a huge part of their success in bringing change about. You are a special young man Sam and you have grit. I know you will undertake the work with commitment.

Stick with the healthy dietary changes you have made. I cannot advise on avoiding stimulant (media, caffeine?). Moderation in everything is always wise.

Keep being courageous and moving forward, you are stronger than you know.

Originally Posted by SamG11

Hi again everyone,



So I've been doing the same as always. The appointment with the therapist is in a week, I just wish life would speed up so I can go.


But what I wanted to share is this weird event/moment that took place tonight.


I will try to explain this as best as possible. So I was out to eat at a restaurant with my father, minding my own business, everything was OK. (Obviously I'm already extremely dreamy already and my depersonalization is 5x worse by just sitting there) but then this happened. I looked in my glass of water I was drinking (out of curiosity) and noticed a hair.


I was grossed out but I also laughed at the same time, I said to my dad a little loudly then I should, and said "there is a hair in my water" and an waitress looked directly at me and I look directly at her.


Now HERE is the weird part. As soon as the waitress looked at me it's almost like my brain just clicked, and I got EXTREMELY dizzy. Life just froze for a moment as I looked at her like a dear in headlights, and it just felt so weird. When I looked back at the table I felt like everything was spinning for a couple seconds. Then it went away. I felt out of control, I felt like my brain and my whole body and surroundings just were spinning.



Now I wonder... does this have anything to do with what I'm suffering with? Is this a form of epilepsy or vertigo? Panic attack? Anxiety? I am stumped. I definitely think this is related to my dream like state, because I get it I would say once a month.



My heart was also pounding and I felt extremely nervous... but its funny because it was just over a hair that triggered this awful feeling.



I dont know. I just think it is hinting towards what the hell is wrong with me, and I'm also scared because this is how the dream state came to start. It started off very slowly and It would click on every once in a while, then a event made it permanent.