Call your therapist again and leave a message if you need to do that but tell them it's urgent you speak with them.

Yeah, people can be disappointing sometimes but your T might not be available and may not know it's urgent unless you tell them it is. Has your T ever talked to you about a back-up plan if they're not immediately available? Someone who covers for them when they're away, or anything like that?


Other than that you could call the hotline number for the area in your State that was posted earlier. We are not professional counsellors.

http://suicidehotlines.com/wisconsin.html



http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/whe...or-depression/
How to Help Yourself if You Are Depressed

I just heard back from my T. I called her again actually and she was just getting ready to call me. Things are ok for now. I told her I would wait till wed. when I see her to make up my mind about living. I soooo want to be with my grandma.

sssss...Maybe it would help to talk about your grandma. It sounds like she loved you very much. I really am sorry, too, that you are missing her. I know it is really hard to get over something like that. We all lose people that we love. They are our angels, watching over us. She wants you to be happy right here sweet Jen.

I'm glad you heard back from your T doc. Keep fighting, you are worth it, and so is life. There are good things in life right here that make it worth living.

Jen, that's really good that she phoned you back and you've been able to talk with her right now. I'm glad that's helped you feel a little better. Excellent news.

You're in the right place here. I have nothing but compassion for you,and I understand panic,stress,depression,OCD,and suicidal thoughts.

My bouts with anxiety started younger then I'm aware of. My family said I had a low cry I guess when I was a baby. I had OCD symptoms before I was ten. Whatever it is it hurt my reading ability,and I ended up in Military School when I was about 16. Things where alright at first,but things happened,and I started having panic attacks,and anxiety that made me stiff in my neck,and shakey,and tense all over.

Please be patient. You will make it,just don't quit please. There is a reason for you to exist,though it seems dark right now.

Please keep taking your medicines,and keep seeing your counselor. You are worth the time. You are of value,just as much as any of us.

Try to stay where you are right now. I don't think you should move out,because that would cause more anxiety,and confusion. Please stay where you are.

When you say panic,I deeply understand how devistating that can be. I know how that is,and how misunderstood the condition is.

Our doctors,and scientists need to help us a little more with this condition. Society needs to remove the stigma more then they have,but it's more understood now then ever before. Things are slowly changing. Brokenfriend

This SOS forum,and the Bipolar forum are well monitored. Feel free to come to the Bipolar forum also. Welcome to Neurotalk. We want to help you. BF

To everyone that has read and responded. Thanks so much for all your support. It's morning now, and I thought after talking with my therapist I would feel a bit better, but the truth is that I don't. I thought talking about being suicidal and feeling of hurting myself would help me. It did at the moment, but feel just as bad.
I was very very very close to leaving the house last night and going to a bridge that I love. I obsess over it, because it is my plan to end it all. That leaded me to think about all the pills in my room that I have. I couldn't get it out of my mind, and was getting really scared and anxious. I haven't come this close in a while. I didn't do anything, i just hope today will be a little bit easier.
Anyways, thanks for listening.
Jenni

We will always listen Jenn, I hope you will.

Good morning sweet Jen...I am happy to see that you survived the night, and the morning. You are very much in my prayers. Illnesses don't generally improve overnight. It takes time, personal effort, and loving help. Nothing worth having comes to us very easily. Sometimes (especially people like us), have to fight for it. I don't pretend to know why. I just know it is true.

I also know that the battle is worth it. It can be a long hard arduous journey, but, like taking a hike, or climbing a mountain, there is much beauty to be experienced along the way. We just have to go looking for it. Try doing small things at first that you enjoy.

You are doing a very important thing right now by reaching out and surviving. Sometimes that is all we can do, until things start to get better. One tiny baby step at a time, one foot in front of the other, and a whole lot of faith.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jloQ6...eature=related

Please keep choosing life dear friend, you don't know right now what joys await you just a little ways down the road. You have to be in this life, here, right now, to get there.

Many of us here are, and have been, where you are right now, and we can see ahead. Let us help you, and give you some hope.

Goodmorning Jen, I'm so happy you are still here with us! Rough nites S$#K! The days are sometimes easier.....My sis also has a Favorite Bridge in mind,,,,

Most of my family from Mom down to her grandkids are afflicted with this horrible condition! We haven't lost anyone yet....but many attempts by all of us! Could be genetics??? I truely believe this is a Medical condition, but because it is sooo personal, some people think it's all in ya head!....It goes hand-n-hand but it is a Medical Condition.....NOT Your fault,,,,You did Nothing Wrong....Yes, Unfair as hell, but it's there....

Tell us about yourself! What do you do for fun? What makes You SMILE???
Gardening makes me SMILE, Pets, fish,,,Beautiful, Sweet smelling flowers, CHOCOLATE!

Also,,,I NEED to share this with you...I have no idea what, or if you Believe in,,,,God, Christ, Buddha, Allah, nothing,???? It does not matter to me, For me it is Christ! My hubby...Allah, Best friend...Nothing, Best Doctor EVER...Buddha...........
But this is what someone told me at my weakest time: They PROMISED,,,if I read the BIBLE every day, even just one sentence a day,,,each day my life would get better....
I could not read well after my accident, never mind understand what I read....BUT THEY WERE RIGHT!!!!! Each day I just starting feeling better...here I am 9 years later, a Broken body but a Happy Soul!!!