Why is it so hard to accept all the loss that comes from RSD? Maybe I have a hard time accepting whatever does not go my way? Even when I know resistance only brings more pain physically and emotionally. Maybe it says more about me, and how I react than what is happening? Maybe it is about not being in control? Even knowing there is not much I can control does not stop me from wanting to control. I do know that acceptance helps to bring solutions. Until I accept what is, I will not even be able to see solutions. It will give me perspective. Even doing a little changes the problem. Maybe that is the solution. Not to look at the big picture just do what I can each day and accept that it is good enough. lol not like I really have a choice.
What do you think?
peace
zinnia

Acceptance is important...but it's just one piece of the puzzle. I accept that I have RSD...I accept that I have limits...and sometimes I choose to ignore them and deal with the consequences because what I want to do is more important to me than the cost (which seems higher and higher as time goes by). Every day is filled with choices...most are small and some are big. I think it's important to accept that I have RSD and all that goes with it only because it helps me make more informed decisions. So long as I accept that some of my choices to do certain things come with consequences then that's ok...it's my CHOICE. But deluding myself into thinking that I'm normal and can do things like I used to...THAT is dangerous territory and what I think we all need to avoid.

We have more control over our lives than I think we give ourselves credit for. As I said...most of the choices we make are small things in a given day but they all add up to the big picture. My days all start with a choice to get out of bed and go from there. Is it frustrating sometimes when we think about the things we CAN'T control? Of course...but the best advice I ever got since getting this stupid condition is to not worry about the stuff I can't control but focus on what I CAN control. That has helped me through some of the absolute worst times. It's not always easy to do...lol...but when I get into a bad place mentally it helps me pull myself together and reorganize my thoughts in a positive way.

Catra

Thank you! You really helped me tonight. I appreciate your response. You made many good points. I do need to focus on what I can do. I was able to work in the garden and clear one little space of weeds, while sitting in a chair. I need to make some choices about what I can do, ways to make it easier, and much smaller. Accept that I can not do what I did before. Last year at this time I was sitting in a wheelchair, unable to even walk in the garden.

I was walking, without the cane, and then all these back and hip problems, it is discouraging. My back became weak from not doing anything. I do know I have to keep moving. I need to accept that my husband is not going to help me in the garden, it is hard enough for him to keep the yard mowed, as he has back problems. Just saying that is helping me accept it. Reality check. Thank you Catra.
peace
zinnia

Catra,

I had a really good day today. Slow and steady with rest in between, I got a lot done. I set the timer so I would stop. I focused on what I could do, what I was accomplishing, even set some little goals out loud. I asked for a little help from hubby and got it. I asked him to put the wash in the dryer, all that twisting and turning is a bad thing for my back. He even fixed me supper and brought it to me. He dug up some big dandelions, his idea to help. I am going to order a long handled hand hoe, so I can sit on the chair and not have to bend over so far. The garden did not seem so hopeless, just getting a little done made a positive difference in how I saw it today.

I spent some time with my higher power this morning and let it all go, cleared my mind and listened to his good orderly direction. I did hear Stop and Rest throughout the day. Even found another heating pad so I could put one where I sit on the couch. I focused on now. It made a big difference.
peace
zinnia

That's fantastic! I am so glad you had a good day and were able to find good balance today between doing what you want and resting. The timer is a good idea.

I'm so glad you are having success with focusing on the now. For me, that was how I got to an "acceptance" point. I took a class on mindfulness and it helped me focus on living in the now, instead of thinking about what I could do 2 years ago or what I will be able to do 5 years from now. There are things I can do right now and I'm going to do them and enjoy them while I still can. I have no idea what tomorrow will bring, so I want to live a life of joy now, while I know it's possible. I hope your focus on the now continues to bring you the strength you need to get through.