i have rsd or crps type 2 since 1995. Everyone I know, hasn't a clue what RSD is. Those people don't know I take Methadone and Zanaflex 4 times a day and have refused so many meds other than those two.

i have rsd in my arms, shoulders, neck, hands, fingers, hips, legs, knees, ankles, feet, and toes...and in my mid-section. I live with constant burning/electrical/freezing pain like stepping on a hot burning nail that's plugged into an electric circuit. my hands and feet are so cold to the touch that my wife tells me it hurts her if i touch her with them. (typos sorry) my feet are modeled and look like brown spotted diseased feet. my doctor once said back in 2001 that they look like insect bites...it's 2009, and now they look like I'm turning brown hundred specks at a time.

however, unlike everyone else with rsd, my sex drive is so increased that i am ashamed of my nervous responses. so ashamed that i cannot look anyone in the eye. i am 24 years monogamous and yet my mid section makes me feel like a bi hooker at best.those sensations are so much worse than the pain because everyone seems to understand or even likes to see others in constant pain?

My wife has no idea how to deal with any of the rsd, so she choses to get drunk every night and pretend i'm not here. but she says, i love you...until she passes out drunk. i guess it's easier on here than massaging me and being there for me sexually? I guess for her, my rsd makes it ok to drink every night and to act like i'm not here?

socially, i'm an extremely nice person to meet and know. privately, i live in a world filled with horrific pain and i feel like a reject because nobody understand the pain and depression i live with.

i found this site by looking up rsd and suicide.

if you have full body rsd, you know what i'm going through. now add being sexually tormented by your own sexual organs and your **** 24/7/365 followed by the fact that your soulmate gets drunk nightly just so she won't have to deal with your bodily neediness. heaven forbid her for not caring...it's all my fault for having rsd.

my wife calls me many times a day while she's at work just to check on me. I never tell her how i really feel. She loves her job and i don't want to mess it up for her, so i lie. when she comes home, I feel like i am not worthy of her company. She teasingly tells me how she loves me. i respond

the same stuff happens every day and night. i am suicidal. it's a shame she can't understand how her nightly actions are killing me. guess that's what rsd is all about?