[todayistomorrow]

It's almost been a year since my accident and my wife thinks the only thing keeping me from getting better is depression. I just got the book Brainlash and it's been useful to me. My wife reads the section on depression and think she's an expert on the topic. I tell her to read the other parts as PCS is very complex. She refuses and is confident this is the only think holding me back from recovery. Argument ensues and yelling back and forth. Not fun.

I was starting to make some big improvements with no headaches with amitryptaline and reduction of brain fog. I told her a couple months ago I was feeling good and could start to look for a job. I then relapsed a few weeks ago when I developed horrible allergies and tried to get off the amitrypaline. Headaches were terrible and brain fog came back so I've defintely been down the past few weeks.

I got back on my meds and headaches have gotten botter but brain fog is still really bad. Most days I do little but rest, watch TV for a few hours, and go for walks. She makes comments on how this isn't even a life I'm living and no wonder I'm depressed. She's also tired of supporting me and gives me an ultimatum either get a job or it's done.

I'm willing to try anything to get better but I really don't think depression is a major cause. When my symptoms get better, I'm not depressed in the sligthest. I do have bad days where I get pretty sick of feeling lousy, but I grind through the day with optimism that I'm slowly getting better daily. It's not easy having to rely on my wife financially(which I'm thankful for) and also not being as sharp cognitiviely/physically as I used to be.

So we agree I'll go to counseling but I think a typical pyschologist will just label this depression and won't understand what I'm experiencing. My insurance doesn't cover neuropyschologist so it just seems like this will be a huge waste of time and false hope that this is the magic cure. Any advice?

[Astrid2803]

I wonder considering the fact that your medical aid doesn't pay for a neuropsychologist, would they pay for a psychiatrist because they'd be able to prescribe better suited medication than anti-depressants?

Over the years I've gone through about five different doctors only for them to change me from one anti-depressant to the next. Eventually I was diagnosed with a mild form of epilepsy, and since then I've had a lot more progress.

I really hope that your wife comes to understand what this is actually all about.

If you get the chance, check out the thread under "How Can I help friends and family Understand?". Mark in Idaho suggests a link to videos on youtube which may be of some help. I could not believe how accurate it is!
Maybe it will at least get your wife thinking....

[Mark in Idaho]

today,

What meds have you tried besides the amitriptyline? There are good anti-depressants that can help you get stable.

Finding a simple manual labor job can get you active with some income. Getting into a daily schedule can improve your disposition.

But, as astrid said, check out "You Look Great" at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9Xso...ature=youtu.be

I don't care for BrainLash. It has far too much angst. It is hard for me to relax and understand her ideas.

It you are not healing, Have you had the quiet rest with good nutrition that your brain needs? There is no way to recovery without quiet rest.

Finding a labor oriented job with little interference from others and low stimulation can produce the quiet rest your brain needs. No pushing physically.

Does your state have a Vocational Rehab Agency? They can often provide some help. Your state's Disability Determination Department can direct you to the available help. Have you tried applying for Social Security Disability Income? The application process can get you into a system of help and direction.

Ask as many questions as you need. Somebody has been there and done that.

My best to you.

[todayistomorrow]

Originally Posted by Mark in Idaho

today,

What meds have you tried besides the amitriptyline? There are good anti-depressants that can help you get stable.

My neuro started me with vicoprofen. The hydrocodone helped me get through very bad headaches early on. I tried fioricet which made them worse. My primary care physiciain didn't want me taking painkillers long term so had me try amitripytaline.

As far as disability goes, I don't think I would qualify because I scored really high on my neuropysch evaluation(I felt I did terrible at the tests). I did poor in a few areas like visual memory and recall but the Dr. thought I was just depressed. I understand that some pyschologist are biased in these and always attribute an underlying mental issue as the cause.

One thing I thought was very true in the book was when she wrote something along the lines of "mTBI is an injury that falls outside the bell curve for getting compassion."

I'm wary of trying new anti depressants. I think my body might just need a couple weeks to get used to taking a full dose again and hopefully I'll be at where I was a couple months ago.

My wife won't read any of the material I give here. She just picks and chooses the pieces that fit her profile of me.

I told my primary care Dr. I was thinking about taking vitamins and she did a blood test for everything and came back normal. I eat well.
VITAMIN B12 Normal 432 pg/mL 200-1100
Final 08/03/2012 074
FOLATE, SERUM Normal 10.8 ng/mL

Maybe I will try a pyschiatrist and see what they say.

[windseeker242]

I'm fortunate in that I'm not in a serious relationship so I have nobody to "support" but I do know exactly how you feel. I'm unable to work due to my condition thus I live at home with my family. They all think that I'm depressed and that going for a run or getting a job and PHOOF - I'll be better. They think that if I just think positively this will all go away. I've tried so many analogies and different ways to try and get them to understand and they just don't get it. I was a member of a Facebook PCS group and someone posted a quote that hit the nail on the head.

"Why is it the people who understand the least about my condition have the most opinions about it?"

I was visiting a Chiropractor and after about 15 sessions I started to see some results. Nothing major, just a minor improvement. I gauge it at about 7% to 10% of an improvement but an improvement nonetheless. My grandmother (who was paying for the visits) told me that she will not be paying for it anymore because "we" are not seeing results.

I'm at my wits end trying to get them to understand. Now I just tell them "I'm feeling fine"
I figure if I tell them what they want to hear they will back off a little......I hope.

PCS sucks........

[Mark in Idaho]

today,

Your B-12 and folate are at 50% of what an injured brain needs. You should be at the top of the scale. 1000 for B-12 and 20+ for folate. How about your D, calcium and magnesium?

Your doctor's discounting of supplement therapy shows how weak he is in understanding the brain.

You should try the SSDI application anyway.

What did you score high on in the NPA?

I was approved for SSDI due to my difficulty working consistently in a work environment. The term is "pace and persistence." I can not maintain the pace and persistence required for a work environment. The occupational psychologist also believed that I would struggle maintain proper work relationships with authority, etc.

Have you tried any other antidepressants besides amitriptyline? An SSRI may allow you to stabilize.

My best to you.

[todayistomorrow]

Originally Posted by Mark in Idaho

today,

Your B-12 and folate are at 50% of what an injured brain needs. You should be at the top of the scale. 1000 for B-12 and 20+ for folate. How about your D, calcium and magnesium?

She didn't say anything about my caclium and magnesium so I guess they didn't test that. Here's my Vitamin D levels. She said my iron levels were normal. Should I take a 1,000 mcg B12 vitamin or 1/2 of a pill? I bought GNC megamen multivitamin but I was worried about taking before I got the results of my test as I don't want to overdo any of the supplements.

VITAMIN D, 25-HYDROXY, LC/MS/MS
VITAMIN D, 25-OH, TOTAL Normal 37 ng/mL 30-100
Final 08/03/2012 074


25-OHD3 indicates both endogenous production and

supplementation. 25-OHD2 is an indicator of exogenous

sources, such as diet or supplementation. Therapy is

based on measurement of Total 25-OHD, with levels

<20 ng/mL indicative of Vitamin D deficiency, while

levels between 20 ng/mL and 30 ng/mL suggest

insufficiency. Optimal levels are > or = 30 ng/mL.

VITAMIN D, 25-OH, D3 Normal 32 ng/mL See Note:
Final 08/03/2012 074



VITAMIN D, 25-OH, D2 Normal 5 ng/mL See Note:
Final 08/03/2012 074

For the NPA test, I scored high in the math section(which was really basic) and general knowledge. I used to be really good at doing hard mental math in my head but now it's to hard to hold the numbers and my brain gets foggy quickly and I have to stop.

I have tried any other antidepressants. Can I still take amitryptaline and an SSRI? I'm worried if I get off the amitryptaline my headaches will come back and they are unbearable.

I couldn't agree more with you windseeker. Stay strong and know there are others who understand the battle you face on a daily basis. Unfortunatley people who don't have PCS seem to just not get it and have their own genius medical opinions.

[Mark in Idaho]

It is not uncommon for a subject to score high on the intelligence tests, math, etc. Concussion rarely causes a big loss of basic intelligence. High intelligence with low processing speed and memory scales is indicative of a brain injury. Depression tends to cause a more global reduction of functions.

The MegaMen is a good vitamin. No reason to hold back. 1000 mcgs of B-12 is fine. A D3 supplement would also be good. Mag and calcium are important. They both need to be taken because there is a balance point between the two.

More later.

[mollymum]

I am in a si.ilar situation with my partner. He has seen me go through major depressive episodes in the past as I had thst before my accident. I take 200mg of sertraline a day for that and it also helps to reduce the tension headaches. I now worry less about what I was previously able to do.

My partner has been used to being the 'injured' one in the household as he sustained a back injury 5 years ago and is unable to work. He was incredibly pampered by his mum before he came to live with me and my kids.

Before my accident this wasn't a major issue as my work kept me active and fulfilled. I have now been stuck at home with him since March and resentment is building up. He has little urge to understand my condition and does not give me the space to rest. He won't read anything about my condition but I am very well versed in all of his ailments.

It is hard to know what to do because the pcs leads to poor communication ability to resolve anything and impulsivity and massive mood swings from me put him in the firing line for everything!